Bloganuary Day 18: What book is next on your reading list?

OK- so they have me talking about books…

Let’s start with what I recently finished:

  1. When Ghosts Come Home by Wiley Cash
  2. The Last Thing He Told Me by Laura Dave
  3. The Maid by Nita Prose (is that her real name- I mean really- an author named prose?)

What I’m reading now:

  1. Zen: The Art of Simple Living by Shunmyo Masuno
  2. The Best of Me by David Sedaris
  3. The Home Edit Life: The Complete Guide to Organizing Absolutely everything at work, home and on the go by Clea Shearer
  4. The Narrowboat Summer by Anne Youngson
  5. A Deadly Affair by Agatha Christie
  6. A Year of Positive Thinking: Daily Inspiration, Wisdom and Courage by Cyndie Spiegel
  7. The Comfort Book by Matt Haig

WHAT’S NEXT:

The Exiles by Christina Baker Kline

Bloganuary Day 17: What is a superpower you’d love to have?

I have two favorite Christmas movies: A Christmas Carol (1951) and It’s a Wonderful Life. I watch them every year on either Christmas Eve or Christmas Day.

If you know anything about either of these movies, you will know that they both have spirit guides, so to speak, who are able to show the character what the future holds. In both cases, it enables the main characters to change their ways and thoughts.

Powerful stuff.

I wish I could be a spirit guide so that I could show people what the future holds if they continue to do things as they do.

I don’t think people think too much about the consequences of their actions. I think people just act or react, without much thought to what will actually happen. They errantly assume that something is right, without fully weighing all the things about it that could be wrong. Sometimes people see things as they see them, instead of the way that they really are… While it’s lovely to have ideals, they rarely work in actual practice…

I know it boils down to the half empty/half full scenario…people get locked into how they look at things and can’t see the other side- but sometimes you have to look straight at it and just say:

“This is a glass. The glass has water in it. Where do we go from here? What happens if we drink it? Spill it? Add more water? Drop the glass? Drink half the water? “

I would like to show people the different scenarios that the glass with water in it could take- not just the cut and dry half empty half full…

I want to be your guide to the future- the real future- not the fantasy one…

BloganuaryDay 16: What is a cause you passionate about, and why?

Just say no to Censorship

All sides should be allowed to have an opinion and state it openly, whether it’s on a stage, on screen or on the pages of a book.

Those who have censored things end up being on the wrong side of history. They prove to be bullies. They prove to be all about intimidation.

Stop telling people that they are wrong just because you don’t agree with them. Stop books and tv shows and movies from being banned.

Allow everyone to have a voice. Don’t allow anyone to become disenfranchised.

Say NO to banning the written and spoken word.

Bloganuary Day 15: What is a life lesson you feel everyone can benefit from learning?

Forgive.

Forgive.

Forgive.

Some people errantly think that forgiving shows weakness, that it lets the offender off the hook for whatever the misdeed was.

The people that think that way are quite misguided.

We forgive others so that we can get on with our lives. We forgive because holding on to the anger is stagnating.

If someone wronged you, and you hold on to that hurt, they still have power over you. Why do you want someone else to continue to have power over you?

I get that some things are unforgivable- that some wrongs are so egregious that you can’t for one second think about forgiving. And I’m not saying that you have to go up to that person and shake their hand and then have a coffee. You don’t ever have to tell the person that you forgive them. You can keep that forgiveness a secret between your head and your heart. I’m saying that in your heart you should just remember that what’s done is really done, and all the hostility that you’re holding in your heart should be pushed away to make room for something better, something that will make you more whole than you are right now.

There’s a statute of limitations on how long you can blame someone else. Ask yourself if you are living the best life that you can, or if you are letting the actions of others drag you down. Does it really make you feel better to blame someone else?

Forgive.

It’s for you.

Allow yourself to let it go and move on.

Bloganuary Day 14: Write about a challenge you faced and overcame

I am currently on my second marriage, but you never know how things will work out, so feel free to send me a resume to have on hand in case the day comes that I am shopping for a 3rd husband…always good to be prepared…

But to the more serious question:

getting divorced was not easy.

Let’s start with the feeling of failure. I picked a crappy guy. I failed at what should have been easy- loving someone who loved me. When I was younger, I was very afraid of making mistakes, and I did not have much resiliency. I was not so great at bouncing back. So admitting to myself that I have erred so badly…it was a lot for me to take. I stayed in the marriage way longer than I should have because I couldn’t accept that I made a mistake.

Of course, my Mother was scandalized. To this day I think she still carries a veil of shame that both her daughters are divorced- she’s actually said “How bad was I as a mother that both my daughters be divorced.” For those paying attention, my divorce became all about my Mother.

Then, there was my Mother telling me to try counseling. To give him another go. to try to work it out. And while I know that many do jump out of marriages too quickly without putting in the work, this was not the case. My Mother was just couldn’t accept the divorce- her daughter was not supposed to get divorced. The worst part was, she knew he was a piece of crap. But my Mother is overly ruled by appearances- she doesn’t like the way divorce looks- and if you know my Mother you will know that she’s always right- in fact- she will make sure she tells you how right she is about everything and how she is the smartest person in the room, and one day I will appreciate how smart she is…

So the challenge became not only divorcing my ex husband, but getting over my Mother’s disappointment at my life choices.

With much self reflection and a ton of books from the personal growth section at Barnes and Noble, I was able to become a mainly functioning person. When I had a child my number one goal was to help her become a resilient, confident person. And my personal note to self was to never make her feel guilty if she makes a mistake, just be there to support her in whatever way she needs.

Bloganuary: What does your ideal day look like?

Remember when I wrote a blog about the “ABOUT” page for you blog? Remember I likened it to a summary that someone would use on a dating app? And I asked, based on my about page if you would date my blog?

Well, after looking at my 13th prompt, I I sort of feel like I’m answering dating app questions… I mean, look at today’s prompt- isn’t that a question you would ask someone you were interested in romantically? Is WordPress being bought out by a dating app and are they going to combine forces, and this is the way to see if the algorithm can multitask?

But anyway…

My ideal day would include the following, and would preferably start early:

  1. 15 minutes of morning wake up activities including listening to a song with intent, journal, one page of my daily book and a big glass of water
  2. 30 minutes on exercise bike listening to music
  3. Writing for an hour or two- with first cup of properly brewed tea
  4. 20 minute walk with dog
  5. Shower and morning pamper with aromatherapy
  6. finish crossword from night before if not done second cup of properly brewed tea
  7. Brunch, at a pretty place with a bellini and most probably an egg dish, but will not also consider pancakes or french toast. Bacon a plus.
  8. Something culturalish- movie/live performance/museum/botanic garden
  9. walk home if not too far
  10. nap on the couch with HGTV or Food network humming in the background
  11. one hour of reading a book that I really enjoy with of course 3rd cup of properly brewed tea
  12. Dinner is some sort of leftover that I unearthed in fridge- or a salad if leftovers are scarce
  13. Bath- with a face mask and hair mask and any other part of my body that can be masked except for N95 mask
  14. Not too taxing TV show for about 45 minutes
  15. Evening journaling while I have my final cup of tea
  16. Read till sleepy, which if I’ve done everything correctly, shouldn’t take too long

Bloganuary Day 12: What emoji(s) do you like to use?

I hate emojis.

Do you know what I hate even more about emojis? I hate that I actually use them in my day to day. It is my biggest cross to bear, the greatest oxymoron of my little life. For one who prides herself on her love of words, this is where I bow my head in shame and admit that sometimes it’s easier to add a smiley face instead of actually saying “That’s great”.

Lazy I tell you. Lazy. I’m taking the easy way out.

I also know that I am not going to break the emoji addiction. That’s how they get you , you know…One day you’re just texting- using whole words and writing in complete. grammatical sentences.

Then, before you’re very eyes, you notice that you are writing

R U here

because those pesky vowels and sometimes y are just too much to thumb out.

It’s a very short hop to LOL.

Then, the gateway-

🙂

I mean- who knew that a colon and a parenthesis could lead one down the road to literary ruin…

I’m LA. I used to be a word girl. Now I’m addicted to emojis. I know I should stop but I can’t. I love my pink hearts, my crying laughing and the ubiquitous thumbs up.

There. I said it. 😉

Bloganuary Day 11: What does it mean to live boldly?

What does it mean to live boldly?

  1. To say yes in a roomful of no’s
  2. To wear red in a roomful of blue
  3. To not follow a trend
  4. To not jump on a bandwagon
  5. To not use cliché’s
  6. To read things and come up with your own conclusion instead of what is being told to you
  7. to follow you heart instead of anything else
  8. to keep trying when others have stopped
  9. to own who you are and not care what others think
  10. to live on your terms

Bloganuary Day 10: What five things are you grateful for today?

As you know, at the end of every day I write down my best moment of the day, my worst moment, and something I am grateful for. I started this grateful shindig a few years ago and I think it’s the most effective way I’ve found to concentrate on the little things, and how wonderful life actually is. I truly believe that it’s the little moments that make us.

So right this very minute I am grateful for:

  1. dog clothes so that I don’t have to look at my dog’s really pale, lightly furry body
  2. E books so that I can find a book to match my mood even if I end up not liking my choice and reconsider ever browsing in a book shop again because I continually browse and buy sub par fiction (for the record, I have never once regretted a non fiction organizing, personal growth or coffee table book that I browsed in a store- those in particular are always my faves.
  3. My new pink cart which I am using as a quasi self care station and it’s just a delight to wheel it from room to room and know that fuzzy socks are right there if my feet get cold
  4. Fuzzy socks
  5. my little hot plate like device that keeps my tea warm as I write

Day 7 Bloganuary: What makes you laugh?

I admit it.

I’m hilarious.

Ok. Not so much. However, I do love to laugh. But what makes me laugh is something difficult to quantify. So I’ve been sitting here thinking about the times that I know I’ve laughed.

Without a doubt, the thing that makes me laugh no matter how many times I think about it is this particular scene from Taxi. Reverend Jim, who may or may not overuse certain substances, is trying to get his driver’s license, and needs to take the written test. (FYI- there is a longer clip on you tube but I gave you just the small section that never fails to make me laugh)