Aging – Page 2 – Waking up on the Wrong Side of 50

Posted on March 12, 2018 by LA · 39 Comments

You Matter

Ok. It’s secret day. First secret: I buy the majority of my skin care products from the drug store. I don’t use big name, expensive brands. Second secret: I’m a little crazy with skin care. There is nothing I hate more than dry skin, and the older I get, the dryer my skin gets. It’s like the ‘be careful what you wish for’ thing- when I was younger my skin was a bit oily and I longed for it to dry out. Well, I got what I wished for.

I believe I have separate lotions for every part of me. I don’t go anywhere without hand cream. My life is a constant battle to not have my skin crack off. So I use a product on my face known as serum. It goes on before moisturizer, and adds an extra level of protection. I’ve been buying No. 7 for a few months now, so I recently went to replace it. Unfortunately, I did not remember which particular formula I had bought, so I began reading the packaging for the four different serums that they manufacture. While I was comparing and contrasting, a young (very) salesperson came over to me. She was asking me what problem I was trying to overcome. Here’s the third secret: I don’t like being helped in a store unless I ask. I am perfectly capable of figuring things out on my own. So I was a bit ornery when I responded “Well, you tell me. You see my skin. Which serum should I be using? Am I spots, wrinkles, fine lines or industrial strength?” She looked at my face and then she replied, “Well, actually, your skin looks great. Seriously, it’s in really good condition. Which one do you use now? How long have you been using it? You could be the commercial as to why you use it, because your skin looks great.”

So what’s the point? Was this just a big ploy to tell you how great my skin is? No. And yes.

Take care of yourself. This doesn’t mean spending a lot of money. It doesn’t mean being a slave to advertising. But it does mean washing yourself properly and using products that will keep your skin healthy. Just take what you have and be the best you that you can be.

Sorry, you can’t reverse time. You can’t become younger. You can’t make wrinkles go away, or reverse damage, or any of the things that skincare claims. No one is ever going to tell me I look 44 because I use a serum. But you can do your best to maintain what you do have.

Take care of your mind. Take care of your body. Take care of your skin. These are the things you have. Work with what you have and treat them kindly. There is no miracle cure once things go south. Maintain what you have. It is not vain to take care of yourself. You matter. Treat yourself like you do.

I have received absolutely no compensation for talking about No. 7. It was just a detail to my post.

Posted on January 10, 2018January 10, 2018 by LA · 80 Comments

Is It an Excuse

Last week I wrote about adapting, how we must keep learning and changing in order to survive. The comments were amazing, prompting me to continue thinking about the subject. So here’s some new thoughts on the subject of adapt or die.

We’re going to start with an anecdote. When my Husband was about 40, he decided he wanted to be promoted to the next level at his job. After speaking with his boss, he was told that he needed to have an MS in Tax. Without this piece of paper, there would be no more promotions. He already had an MBA, so this would be a second advanced degree. He already worked a lot of hours. We had a young daughter. He asked me what I thought. I told him to go for it- get the degree. And he did. Three years of going to school at night, after a 10 hour day…he completed his course of action. He didn’t love sitting in a classroom again. He didn’t love studying on weekends when he would rather have done other things. A few people actually mocked him- asked him why he was bothering, at his age. At his age, they said, he should be teaching a class, not enrolling in one. But he adapted to his environment, his reality. If you want something you do what it takes.

40 is not old, yet people told him he was too old to go to school.

Which brings us to the next point: is being old, or older a reason not to change?

There were some comments last week about being tolerant of older people who may not like using the internet, that maybe there was no reason why these people should change/adapt. Here’s my thoughts:

We should be tolerant of everyone, regardless of the situation. I ask for tolerance every day, because WordPress and I have a love/hate relationship. I have absolutely no idea what I’m doing half the time. I learn what I can, and hope that no one notices the obvious gaffes. I get frustrated and I muddle through. There are times I’m doing something technical, and I’m on with customer support, and I will say “Talk to me as if I know nothing. Explain it to me in baby steps.” I hope that I get help from someone who understands that it takes me five minutes to find the backslash key on my computer, and that I still refer to “hashtag” as “number sign”. So yes, tolerance to all those who are not as savvy, whatever the situation may be.

But…

Age should never be used as an excuse.

Now I admit, I sometimes use age as an excuse. This is usually when I’m trying to do something that requires an iota of flexibility. This is when I feel my knees give out. Then I blame age. But honestly, I shouldn’t. I should be doing things to increase my flexibility. I should be doing things to ease my achy joints. I have no right to use age as an excuse.

Age should never be an excuse for not learning something. If you don’t want to learn something, that’s fine- but don’t use age as an excuse.

See, the problem with using age as an excuse is that it can backfire. If people use age as an excuse to not learn something new, this could lead to ramifications in the workplace. Like, why should we hire someone of a certain age, because they’re not going to want to learn something new- they’re not going to want to learn that new program. Not wanting to learn or change because of age sets a bad precedent. And what age is the right age to not want to learn something new? 80? 65? 57? 40?

Using anything as an excuse is ridiculous. My friend had an employee say that they couldn’t do something at work because of menopause issues. Really? You couldn’t sit at a desk and use a computer because you had menopause issues? Does that mean that women can’t do work because of menopause? Bad precedent.

If you don’t want to do something, learn something new, adapt- that’s fine. But own it. Say I don’t want to learn how to use the internet because I think it’s a stupid waste of time. Don’t say I’m too old. Because you’re not too old. You just don’t want to. And that’s a big difference.

Don’t use age as an excuse. It’s not fair to the rest of us who want to get up and get on.

Posted on January 9, 2018January 9, 2018 by LA · 53 Comments

You’re So Vain- Part 2

Last week I talked about vanity. As it’s still on my mind (which is probably some sort of vanity itself) I felt I needed to talk about it again.

I met up with my writing group yesterday, two women who were in my fiction class with me. As you may recall, I was vexed by a comment calling one of my characters vain. My friends totally disagreed with the comment, given it’s place in the book and what it was signifying, so I was glad that others shared my opinion. But they enlightened me to something else. We sometimes spend more time on ourselves as we get older.

I freely admit, it takes me longer to get ready now, than it did years ago. To be fair, I’m not the sort of person who takes an inordinate amount of time- I’m pretty much a wash and wear sort of girl. But now, I need an hour to get ready if I need to shower, 25 minutes if not. My Husband doesn’t get this at all, FYI. After 16 years of marriage he still thinks I can be ready in 5. It takes me longer than that to put my moisturizer on.

See, that’s the thing. Make up doesn’t take me a long time. Hair doesn’t take me a long time. It’s the other prep work- the moisture part. As I’ve gotten older, my skin, my hair, my everything has gotten dryer. I have separate lotions for every part of my body. I start with an eye cream, then a face serum, then a moisturizer- and that’s just my face. Heavier cream for my elbows and knees, cream with sunscreen for my hands, foot cream with vitamin E….I even put a few drops of oil in my hair….

This isn’t vanity. This is just so my skin won’t crack and fall off. This is now routine maintenance. Without these creams and potions I would crinkle when I walk. Seriously- it adds a whole new dimension to the term dust to dust….

But….

I admit I stare at my reflection a little harder now. My eyelashes are a little more sparse (I think there is a gel you can put on them to make them more luxurious. the fact that I know this scares me a little). My skin is a little less taut. My undereye bags can now be considered a distinct part of my face. It is hard to look at myself and not see the younger version of me, because in my mind I am still that younger woman. In my mind I am still the woman who was just attractive because there is an attractiveness in youth. Alas, none of us realize that when we are young- we’re to busy trying to grow up. We take for granted the tight skin, the lack of spots and other weird things that eventually creep up on us.

Does this additional self reflection make me vain?

I don’t think so. Maybe it makes me a bit wistful, makes me think of the past. Maybe it forces me to think about choices I’ve made, for better or worse. Sometimes you have to take a long hard look in the mirror, to both remember who you were, to see who you are, and to consider who you will be.

Posted on January 2, 2018January 2, 2018 by LA · 71 Comments

Vanity

According to Miriam-Webster the top definition of VANITY is:

inflated pride in oneself or one’s appearance
something that is vain, empty, or valueless

This is the fact portion of the blog. Now I will proceed to the anecdote

I wrote a chapter for my book that I brought into writing class for dissection. I wrote a scene where my protagonist is preparing for a date. She tells the reader her grooming ritual and states that she is not vain. One piece of feedback I received was “Character seems vain.”

Character seems vain.

Is using make-up and moisturizing creams vain? Are these grooming rituals that I go through myself considered vain? Does the fact that I have a daily grooming ritual make me vain?

I wear make-up most days of the week. I don’t do it for others: I do it for myself. I like eye shadow and liner and blush and mascara. I enjoy this portion of my morning where I either listen to music of the news and get myself ready. I like when I am going out at night and I do something a little more dramatic. I admit, I like the way I look with make-up on. To be fair, I am also happy with myself without make-up.

Does my wanting/liking make up make me vain?

I also have a very elaborate skin care ritual. I wear moisturizer and serum and eye cream. I wash my face thoroughly at night. I like clean, and I like when my skin feels soft. My products all use some form of the words “anti-aging”. I don’t buy these things to appear younger- I buy the products that are best for my skin. I am oldish- I need different things than my teen daughter does. But does my wanting to take care of my skin in an age appropriate manner make me vain?

What is the line between self care and vanity?

I think vanity means different things to different people. If my Mother does not have a full face of make-up on, she will wear sunglasses. Doesn’t matter the time of day, or if he is indoors, she will put on sunglasses because she doesn’t want anyone to see her without make-up. See, to me, that is vain. That’s my definition. My Mother can’t understand how I go out without make-up. I am 53, and she will still say to me “Lipstick. Why aren’t you wearing lipstick?” (OK- here’s my thing- I wear lipstick at night, but during the day I wear tinted lip balm. I don’t care if you can’t see my lips from across the room- I am fine with just a hint of color, but full on protection from chapped lips)

So, for my first real blog of 2018, I ask you all the questions:

What is vanity?

Is being vain bad?

Does caring about yourself reduce your “value”?

This is going to be a multi part blog, as I will look at different aspects of self care in the next few weeks, and look forward to different thoughts on this topic.

Posted on December 5, 2017 by LA · 73 Comments

Old Dogs and New Tricks

I went to an art opening the other night, a photography school in the city. I was invited by a friend, who had a friend exhibiting in the show. The exhibitor was a woman in her fifties, married with 3 teenage/adult children and 2 teenage/adult step children. She had a wonderful career as an architect and decided that she wanted to have a change of pace, so she quit her job and went back to school to learn photography. At fifty something.

Sometimes, we think of being in our 50’s and above, or being empty nesters, as the end of the road. Why do we do this? Fear, society, I don’t know. But we do- many people look at the second half of their life and sigh with resignation. We need to stop doing that. You know in a sporting event, how many second half comebacks there are? And aren’t those come backs the most thrilling to watch and experience? Well, it’s time for our comebacks.

As my writing class nears its conclusion, I noticed that the younger participants have dropped out, literally and figuratively. (to be fair, one of the older participants did as well) Last night, the only ones to do the writing assignment were the over 35’s. Why? I don’t know- I didn’t take a poll, but I’d say the younger ones are either not ready to be writers (writing is really, really hard) or realized that they don’t want to be writers. Which is great that they figured this out.

But let’s focus on the over 35’s. They want to write. They’re writing. They’re taking classes. They’re improving. This includes me. We want to do it. We can do it. We will do it.

So here’s the PSA- we can virtually start over now. Age doesn’t matter. We’re not ready to be pushed aside and looked over. We can do anything.

So if you want to pursue a degree in something- go for it. I mean you Carol(e) sorry- can’t remember how you spell your name, but I think you should become a phycologist, or at least study it- you love it. And anyone else who has a passion or a yearning- it’s not too late to try. We are not too old. Go be whatever you want to be. There are a plethora of online classes now- you could be in a yurt somewhere in the middle of nowhere, but if you have a viable internet connection, you can study Chinese cooking or art history or virtually anything. Go to school, buy a book, join a group. Get back in the game.

Here’s the best thing about being older- we have a much better understanding of who we are as people. Our life experience has made us stronger and smarter. We know how crappy life can be and we learned how to bounce back- no one makes it to fifty without a few setbacks. And because we have a better understanding of who we are, we have a better idea of who we want to be.

I want to be a writer. I don’t know if I will succeed, but I’m going to try.

What do you want to be? Isn’t it worth a try?

Posted on November 1, 2017November 1, 2017 by LA · 48 Comments

Look into the Mirror

I ordered Stitch Fix the other day. For the uninitiated, this is a company that will send you 5 stylish additions to your wardrobe. You fill out a questionnaire- it is very thorough- they ask how you like your clothes to fit, describe your body (are your arms short, average or long), colors, lifestyle. You are shown pictures of various outfits and you rate them, love, like or hate. I’m a quiz kind of person, so this was fun for me. Though too much Buzzfeed left me with expecting an answer as to who my soul mate is (George Clooney if you’re wondering…)

I received my first box the other day. The clothes were shockingly perfect for me, both in style and fit. That’s one hell of an algorithm and stylist combination. I sent pictures to my friends- they were excited to see what I got.

Now- I know many of you know I live in the middle of NYC- a place kind of well known for it’s shopping. Why would I buy clothes online, site unseen, based on what someone who does not know me thinks would be perfect?

Well, I hate shopping. And shopping here is not always a pleasure, especially here. For window shopping it’s wonderful- there are always beautiful things to see. But that’s fantasy shopping. That’s not buying a pair of jeans and a nice shirt to wear out on a Saturday afternoon shopping.

I was also in a style rut. This is multi part. First off, I’m older. I loved the way I dressed when I was younger, but those clothes and styles no longer make me happy. I love mini skirts, but not on me. Not now. 5 years ago sure. But not now. I’m OK with my age. I’m happy to have made it this far. I would wear a big scarlet 50+ sign if I could. (Sorry- daughter is reading Scarlet Letter and I’ve heard about that book for a month now) But I wasn’t sure how to shop for the new me.

This wasn’t just about my age though. It was also about extra pounds lodged around my waist and chest.

I noticed that I was buying clothes that were baggy and shapeless, and I was buying a size too large on top of that. I realized that I was literally hiding under things. I had not realized how much the extra weight I was now carrying was effecting me mentally. This is not healthy on so many levels, but as soon as you realize you are hiding in plain sight, you know it’s time for an attitude adjustment.

I’ve mentioned that I have weight and food issues that I have been dealing with my entire life. I’ve never been anorexic or bulimic, but I’ve still let food dictate my life. For much of my adult life I’ve been able to deal with it, but at the end of the day, the issues are still deep inside me. They have the ability to reappear at any moment. I must be aware of this.

So this is why I asked a complete stranger to pick out clothes for me. I needed a gentle nudge. I needed to know that I can still be me, even with the added pounds. I needed to exist. I needed to come out of hiding.

But it wasn’t just the clothes- it was my whole appearance. I love make up and manicures and all things once considered girly. I love them for me, because they always made me feel good- but I noticed I was getting very lax. My cuticles were a mess, I walked around with chipped polish, I was letting more and more time go between haircuts. The extra pounds made me feel like the there was no point in taking care of myself.

Big. Red. Flag.

Once I was fully aware of what I was doing- I set up a plan to change. Raise your hands if you’re shocked that I wrote out a list and added things to my planner.

I wore some of my new clothes on Saturday. I did my nails. I felt lighter. I felt like me again. I really missed me. I’m glad I found her again.

And some of you may think this is superficial, that appearances shouldn’t matter. And that’s great- I get that- the inside is what counts. But see, with me, the insides weren’t at 100%, which was affecting the outside. The insides were affecting my whole person. So I self corrected.

Sometimes you have to self correct.

Posted on October 18, 2017October 18, 2017 by LA · 35 Comments

Continuing On

You’ve heard me talk about the importance of family tradition. I believe families should have rituals that they follow in some sort of pattern. Last weekend, my family went to a corn maze- we have been doing the maze at this location for 12 years. As we walk down the path, we look at the pictures from past mazes and talk about how fast we did them. Competitive family- we try to beat our time from the previous year- my daughter is sort of a maze savant- (this year, Queens County Farm Museum threw us a curve ball- they made the maze longer and more difficult- so we had to readjust our expectations)

But just like families- couples and individuals should have rituals too. My Husband and I did not really have these rituals when my daughter was younger, because we did so much as a family unit. But we realized a few years ago that our daughter had her own life. She no longer played soccer and softball, so our attendance was not required at games. We were no longer needed at weekend activities- she played in a tennis tournament a few weeks ago and told us we didn’t need to come. She has plans and she has homework and she has more homework. The husband and I are sort of free.

So- we began a new set of traditions. We go to the Orchid Show at the Botanic Garden, the cherry blossoms at the other garden, etc. Last weekend we went to Open House New York (OHNY). OHNY is where building and organizations open up their doors and give tours- these places are not often seen by the public. We had tours of two gorgeous churches, including The Church of the Transfiguration (where PG Wodehouse got married) and Marble Collegiate (where Norman Vincent Peale was Pastor). We also went to Center for Book Arts, where they actually lay the type for some funky books. I can’t give a good explanation of this place though, hence why I don’t write reviews) but suffice to say it was cool, interesting and different, and I’m considering taking a class just to see how books are made the old fashioned way.

So- now that I’ve included Sunday Wrap up into Wordy Wednesday…….

I also have started my own traditions. I now go to the Tribeca Film Festival every year (I think you get the idea of what this is) I go to the New Yorker Festival (which is basically an event for the editors of the New Yorker to show how intellectual they are by running panel discussions and interviews). I find things to do on an annual basis.

Why are traditions important?

They give you something to look forward to.

I think as people get older, many have a dread that life is over. They’ve had kids, they’ve had careers, they’ve owned houses. They have done some of the things they set out to do. They also realize that there might be some stuff that they never got around to doing. That’s when the sadness creeps in. They don’t always know what to do next- all they see is an empty calendar- days with nothing to fill them.

So you fill in the blanks.

Annual events are an easy way to start. If I know the New Yorker Festival is the second weekend of October each year, I can jot it down. That’s a day in the calendar that is not blank- that is something I look forward to. (I know- half of you are thinking- OMG- she’s off on one of her scheduling tangents- you’re tired just thinking about writing something in your planner (?) for a year from now…I get it….but….)

As we get older, we need to adapt and/or change. Yeah- I get it – change is hard. But not changing- well, does that make things easier?

I switched to glasses this week- I didn’t want to, but I had no choice. Accept and move on. My daughter will be going to college in a few years and I will no longer see her on a daily basis. Accept and move on. Adapt to the new reality. Live in the present.

Posted on July 10, 2017July 10, 2017 by LA · 22 Comments

I’m too Old for That

I play this silly app, Design Home (where I get to live out my fantasy of being Joanna Gaines for 20 minutes a day) and when I was voting the other day, I noticed an interesting screen name: “I’m too old to play this game”. Now, I’m not too old to play the game, but I thought about other things I am too old to do.

Wear stilettos. Yes, I know I look hot in them, but really, standing in heels is not something I want to do
Maintain my hair in it’s natural brunette state. Vanity has precluded me from going grey, so I have turned to the shade that has more fun. If you knew me, you would know that blonde is the last thing I ever thought I would be. And I’ve always been fun…
Be petty. Of course, just because I’m too old for it doesn’t mean I’m never petty.
Be mad at my parents for parenting mistakes, or things they did. It’s done. My life is my responsibility.
Care what others think of me. Frankly, you are too old for this on the day you are born.
Eat after 9pm. Seriously, there’s logic behind the early bird special.
Leave the house without a list of everything I’m supposed to do, buy or see. And list should be in chronological order.
Finish a book that I hate. I used to have this thing about finishing every book I started- it only succeeded in making me miserable.
Argue with my husband about stupid things. It’s never worth it.
Accept an invitation to something because I’m “supposed to”. Unless I can think of a valid reason as to why I am “supposed to”.
Shop at Forever 21. I realize the name implies that I’ll always be 21, but I can’t fathom shopping at the same place my daughter does.
Sit in the direct sun at the beach. Or sit on a blanket on the sand. I like an umbrella and a chair. Call me a Princess.
Hold on to anger. It doesn’t mean I can’t get angry (you may have read a rant or three of mine) but it does mean I have to let it go.
Hold on to sadness. Same rules apply.
Pretend I am younger than I am- why bother? What’s wrong with the age you are?
Obsess about my looks. When I say obsess, I mean constantly wondering why I don’t look the same as I did 20 years ago. The goal is to be healthy and take care of myself.
Snapchat. Seriously- anyone over the age of 30 that says they know what snapchat is, is lying.
Ski. I know I’m not too old for this, but I just don’t like skiing.
Engage is discussions about politics or religion. No good can come from this. Everyone is entitles to their own opinion.
Play tennis with my daughter and win. Two years ago, I was able to beat her. Winning is now a distant memory. She is faster, stronger, and I hate to admit this, smarter than me.

Don’t worry- there will soon be a list of things I am NOT too old for!

Posted on June 29, 2017June 29, 2017 by LA · 16 Comments

A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the U2 Concert…

Coincidence. That’s the word of the day. I was going to see U2 last night. New Jersey Transit was all sorts of messed up, and the Husband was going to be a train behind me. I texted him that it was just so crowded, he should just meet me at the seats. But in a bizarre coincidence, my husband happened to get on the same car as me, and the exact same part of the car. The odds of this happening are…. I don’t know…I have my writing cap on now, not the math one….

After we exit the train and begin walking to the stadium, I heard my name…..I turned around and it was one of my best friends from high school. We’re friends on Facebook, and we chat, but I haven’t seen her in 30 years. 1987. The year Joshua Tree came out. Joshua Tree- the album that was going to be glorified by U2 that very evening. Coincidence.

So on a night already filled with nostalgia, I was really transported back in time. For just a little bit, my memory was very clear. The 80’s just came rushing back. It was the decade when I graduated High School and College. Got my first real job. Became friends with the three most amazing women. Fell wildly in love. It was the decade when everything seemed possible.

And as I walked to my seat I looked around. People were showing ID and buying beer, but the ID was just a formality. It was clear we were all well past 21. it was clear that a lot of people were wearing clothes that were old enough to buy a beer. The crowd was moving a bit slowly, and the conversations centered around tuition bills, and retirements, and arthritis.

But then the stage lights finally started to light red, and we realized there was movement on the stage…..

And the crowd started to sing ” ‘Cause tonight, we can be as one”-

People began swaying, tapping their feet….

Standing and jumping in the air….

And when I looked into the eyes of those around me….

I didn’t see people thinking about retirement….

I saw people as they were in 1987….

Young, full of hope and full of dreams- ready to take on the world.

And as they sang side A- I mean- the first half of that album is almost perfection, filled with songs most will instantly recognize. But if you’re going to have a tour that is centered around an album, you need to play the flip side. The songs that you might not necessarily remember. And the crowd- well, U2 didn’t come on till 9:20, so I’m going to say a lot of the audience hadn’t been up this late recently. And with the average age being around 47, there were a lot of trips to the bathroom, and some muttered grumblings about the volume….. and there eyes started to show their age again.

But I looked at the Husband, who I’d met by coincidence tonight, and met due to a coincidence 25 years ago- and I smiled. It’s wonderful to go back in time for a little bit, to think about places, and things, and people that you may not have thought about for awhile. I have amazing memories, of love and loss, happiness and sadness, good and bad- and I treasure every one of those moments, because they have made me the person I am today. I don’t want to go back in time- I don’t wish I could change anything. I’ve had a pretty great yesterday- today is pretty awesome- and I can’t wait for tomorrow.

Posted on June 20, 2017 by LA · 10 Comments

Sorry- 35 and Older Only

A few weeks ago I read that a new club would be opening in NYC. The theme is 70’s ,80’s and 90’s music- the clientele is 35+. Though I’m not much of a dancer, I find this concept highly desirable. It will be nice to go somewhere and recognize all the songs, to see dances that neither whip or nay nay. It got me to thinking- what else would benefit from an age make-over?

Fitness classes. In my normal Sunday body conditioning class, we’ve already sort of done this. The over 40’s end up on the left side of the room-what we refer to as the geriatric section. When the instructor is particularly grueling, it’s nice to have lined faces to grimace along with as we realize we can’t do 100 burpees. It really provides motivation too- hey, if that old guy can do it, so can this old girl.

Book stores. Now I enjoy zombie/vampire/dystopian books as much as the next guy, but sometimes I’d like to find interesting books on the first floor. Not the fifth floor. In the corner. Under the dust.

Drug stores. I would like to go into a store that has all the anti-aging products in one section. The other things the store could sell would be hair dye, heavy moisturizer, (frankly, products that moisturize everything), orthotics, gingko biloba, and bifolcals. The store should also have a sign listing the most commonly bought items by the 35+ community just in case we forget what we came in for. And forgot our shopping list.

Clothing stores. I would like to enter one that doesn’t play music at levels akin to the eruption of Krakatoa. ( Sometimes, for fun, I go up to an employee and silently mouth the words of what I want. I enjoy seeing them scream “WHAAAAAT” over and over again.)

Restaurants. I think that an awesome centerpiece would be one containing attractive flashlights. It might look nicer than 6 people pulling out their cell phones. Perhaps print the offerings on both sides of the menu. This way you have the option of reading the menu of the person sitting opposite you.

Theaters. I would like to purchase inexpensive mezzanine seats in a theater that doesn’t have stairs that feel as if I’m scaling Everest while wearing heels.

These are just a few thoughts off the top of my head. As much as I love watching the vitality and exuberance of the Millennial generation, sometimes I’d like to mingle with the boomers and the gen exers . They usually have higher credit limits.