As some of you may know, New York is one of 21 states to legalize pot for recreational use. I’m not going to get into my thoughts on drug use, recreational or otherwise. But I am going to talk about living in apartments in NYC.

My husband has a co-worker (CW)who lives in a apartment in an apartment building. The co- worker has a toddler daughter. The co-worker also has a neighbor who is a chain pot smoker.

By chain pot smoker I mean someone who is continually smoking pot all day. The neighbors wall is on the flip side of his daughter’s bedroom. The windows are only a few feet away. Somehow, some way the odor wafts into his daughter’s bedroom…

When they exit their apartment into the hallway, it smells like pot.

CW has asked the neighbor to do something so that everything on their floor doesn’t smell like pot.

The neighbor ignores him.

CW has asked building management to do something about the smell.

Building management states that there is nothing that they can do.

So CW now has to figure out if he wants to sell the apartment that he loves and move somewhere else. He doesn’t want to smell pot all the time, and he certainly doesn’t want his child smelling it all the time…

So what do you do?

What would you do if your neighbor was a heavy smoker of anything?

Where does one person’s right to smoke pot infringe on the rights of a neighbor to not want to be around it?

Discuss:

46 thoughts on “The Neighbor Next Door”

  1. Young couple in the unit 2 doors down and same thing, although I’ve only seen the guy for sure. He has to go outside to his small porch because we are a no smoking complex. On some days it’s very obvious and now that the weather is finally warming it will be fully apparent with my windows and doors open. Honestly I can’t make a huge deal out of it. I was not a saint as a 20 yo, although my own dive into pot was in homemade brownie form and that lasted 1 summer only. They are a nice couple, don’t have sketchy people coming to their door at all hours- actually not at all, and it’s as legal as alcohol so…

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      1. I agree in theory yes, same as a child living with alcoholic parents. What do you do though? Report to CPS. If NY CPS is anything like ours they will simply note it somewhere and leave it at that. Without proof that the child is being harmed physically, emotionally, etc are they going to go to every home in the state where a legal substance is being used? I don’t intend to come across as snarky in this but as the management has been notified and they claim they have no recourse really what else is there to do? You’re fully correct that this is a societal issue and it’s one of those that continues to be mismanaged for all the typical reasons: funding, staffing, facilities, laws… It really does fall on the parent of the daughter to make that tough decision to take his child somewhere else no matter how much he feels he shouldn’t have to. I feel like that’s our reality today.

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      2. There’s no forethought into this until kids start to develop issues from being exposed. Then there will be all sorts of Monday morning quarterbacking

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  3. In this world, when it comes right down to it, you can only take care of yourself. Hard as it is, if you don’t want to smell it, you need to move on.

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    1. Yeah, while I get that…it’s not right. If no one obeys the speed limit and drives too fast, do you give up driving? If we’re always held hostage to the person who only thinks about themselves, where are we left?

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  4. I guess I never considered this. When I was in Chicago the other day, I noticed that the smell of marijuana was almost everywhere. It doesn’t bother me, but I don’t have to live in an apartment building with a neighbor who smokes marijuana all day…

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  6. The apartment complex we just moved out of was like this. And recreational marijuana isn’t even legal (yet) in Wisconsin. I’m just not sure there’s anything he can do about it, other than sell his apartment (weird concept to me, OWNING an apartment!) if he is that concerned. I’m not saying that’s right or fair – it is neither – but if it’s legal, I just don’t see any other recourse, sad as that may be.

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  7. NYC is a very odd place. Your governor now wants to ban tobacco, but pot is legal and will remain so. If your neighbor is smoking it I guess you can try to appeal to a sense of decency and ask him to at least open a window. But if he refuses, I don’t think there is anything you can do. Depends on how spiteful you then want to be. You can invest in some cans of Lysol and spray the hall and all around his door. But what you need to deal with is the realization that you are living next to a lout with no consideration for anyone but himself and you should treat him accordingly.

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  8. I feel for the parent with the child. Its not fair that he should have to move away. This is where humans need to have more respect for each other! There are things the guy could do to help keep the odor from spreading, while still being able to smoke, but it sounds like he doesn’t care. Once again the its the whine of “its my right!” and the belief that its all about me, doesn’t matter about you. UGH!!!

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  9. Air purifiers? I have this issue with our son. He smokes pot and when I was driving him to work every day I asked him politely to not smoke just before getting into the car so that I didn’t have to smell it. When he forgot (as he did) I opened the sunroof for a while until it dissipated. I told him that while I wished he wouldn’t smoke so much (at all) he was an adult and had that right but that it was my car and I had the right to make it a smoke free zone. I’m surprised that management can’t do anything, especially if it is spreading out to common areas. Some people can just be jerks.

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  10. Honestly, we are living in a world where the majority of people believe that their rights trump the rights of any & every other person. And so long as the law agrees that they’re not behaving illegally, there is nothing anyone can do – unless they plan on getting into some long drawn out war of attrition.

    Bottom line, your husband’s co-worker has to decide whether to move – and let’s not forget, risk being in a similar (or worse) situation, or to stay and re-arrange how they use their apartment to reduce their daughter’s exposure. In the end, you can only change yourself, you cannot impose change on another person. It may seem unfair or inequitable, but that’s the way the world is, and we’d be tilting at windmills if we think any different.

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  11. Sad to be in that position. I would think an apartment building would have a non smoking policy for anything that could potentially start a fire, if not in consideration of how others have to be impacted by the smoke.

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  12. I live in a block of flats (I guess that’s an apartment building). Pot is I believe still illegal in the UK, but in a city like Glasgow you smell it a lot. We have a couple of neighbours who smoke. One is medicinal and being an old building, the smells come up through the floor from the flat downstairs. It’s bad first thing in the morning. I dont like it, I’ll open the windows, set up some oil burners etc but at the same time, they’re entitled to live their lives too. I work around it, creating my own, more fragrant aromas

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  13. Sadly, I’ve learned that some Smokers tend to get insulted if you criticize their habits. I have neighbors who used to smoke outside their front door which is right by my kitchen window. So if I opened my windows Of course the smoke went right into my kitchen. They got offended when I politely asked if they could smoke elsewhere. It was not pleasant. I wasn’t trying to insult anyone, just didn’t want to inhale it and cough. People are selfish. But if you live in a multi family dwelling you have an obligation to ALL the tenants. In my condo the management took down ash trays that were previously put up by the elevator to discourage smoking. But we have open air walkways. Or loggias.
    I do think we all need to be cognizant of how our actions affect others especially when you choose to live in a multi family dwelling.
    I found that a lot of folks are inconsiderate. And while I was never a smoker, I do have a script from my oncologist for gummies which help immensely with the nausea from chemo. I’m sick for weeks. The side affects from the anti-nausea pills are miserable. So a quarter of a gummy can really help with the horrible nausea. America needs to get over being so uncaring with their neighbors. I’d probably see what my legal options were because everyone has the right to reasonable enjoyment in their home. And the pot smoking neighbors are infringing on the rights of others

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  15. Very sad. I think everyone has already said what is true in this situation. The smoker is not being considerate at all. CW should not have to move because of this person. A child is involved; I remember a case when I was a teacher (and pot was illegal) that was considered child abuse because parents put a child in a closet with strong marijuana. I don’t remember the parents’ motive or if the parent was in the closet smoking. No child should be exposed to that. If it were various environmentally toxic substances, environmentalists and public health “experts” would be all over it, but marijuana gets a pass. I think Stephanie’s perspective of the fire hazard is a valid one as far as legal recourse goes.

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  16. This is how unfortunate our society has become. People lack consideration for others. My 91-year-old still driving dad smokes pot daily. I made the decision that when I go back to So Cal, I can’t stay in his house because it reeks. We have to get a hotel or stay with friends. Your friend has to decide what’s best for his family. Hopefully, he can sell to a pot smoker who doesn’t mind. Otherwise it’s going to be tough to sell the place.

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  17. UGH. I would hate that. Honestly, I don’t even like when neighbors chain smoke cigarettes. Live in smoke free apartments so smokers have no choice but to smoke outside of their apartment, I can’t burn incense because it causes head aches. We once had neighbors from India who cooked very intense smelling food that stunk up every floor. Thankfully there was an outlet in the hall that we could plug air freshener into.
    I personally just try to make do.

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  18. I knew of someone who had a lovely apartment in a vintage building with great neighbors except for the cooking odors. She had 3 neighbors who each had their own cultural cooking. They invited her to dinner many times and she went, but the different smells permeated everything. She invested in some serious air purifiers which helped at least in the apartment, couldn’t do anything about the hall.

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  19. Idk. Weed is such a distinct (and annoying) smell. I’m constantly violated because (even though it’s illegal in FL) everyone seems to be smoking, in the car, their home, events, everywhere.

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    1. The issue has become that as soon as we do something to protect person As rights, we trample on person B. I hate pot smoke, and cigarette smoke, cigar, pipe, etc…it’s a sticking point for me

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