I had a craving for ramen.

I went to the ramen place a few blocks from my house, sat at the counter, and ordered a bowl of ramen.

I’ve written about this matter of factly- but in matter of fact, I rarely go out to a sit down restaurant by myself in the middle of the week and order a meal.

I don’t have a phobia about eating/doing things by myself. I love food and restaurants. But I almost never go out to a sit down meal by myself. Sure, I’ve grabbed fast casual when I’ve been out and about, but waiter service? Rarely.

I guess I think of waiter service food as a treat- it’s something to be savored as a meal rather than merely sustenance. Which I guess makes the real question…

Why do I not want to treat myself?

We could go into the whole mother/wife/woman mindset- how many of us will give our families the best of us and leave the crumbs to ourselves…

We could ponder why I don’t think I deserve this…

Or…

I could just be thankful on the day I craved ramen I just went out and got myself some. That on that particular day, I didn’t overthink, I didn’t question myself or sociological constructs, I just took my e reader out to lunch, and enjoyed a spicy bowl of tonkatsu, no nuri or egg, with curly noodles.

Try not to think about what others expect of you: try to think about what you expect of you.

Sometimes we have to allow ourselves some little luxuries.

49 thoughts on “Little Luxuries”

  3. Good for you. I always had many challenges when I was overseas in the Middle East eating alone because of the cultural stigma-it did not seem many women eat alone, and I get a few stares. I ended up getting take away. I found I was not along in this as many foreigners overseas did the same. I don’t mind a cup of coffee along but since I eat so sporadically I just eat out with the husband or a friend. Good for you.

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  5. I went to Barnes and Noble once and had lunch in the cafe area. I was doing it as an exercise in an art journaling project, taking an artist date for myself. It felt a little weird but I was journaling so that helped. I think that’s the only time I’ve ever done something like that.

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  9. I had a friend in college that would go to the nicest restaurant by herself that was close to campus. She had so much confidence. I learned from her and I do treat myself to a sit down meal by myself from time to time.

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  10. Good for you. You make such a good point about how hard it is to treat ourselves — and your closing sentence to think of what we expect of ourselves. I don’t mind going out to eat by myself but I will rarely afford myself the time. Hmm – Great food for thought.

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  11. Sounds lovely, LA! I think eating solo can be the best for people watching…thanks for the reminder. I haven’t done it for a while but will put it on my self-care ‘to-do’ list. 😎

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  15. For some reason, this seems odd to me. I suppose I got over the dining alone in nice places back in my early 20s. It was sort of a big deal back then, but didn’t suppose it still was. I’m glad you had a nice time out for yourself!

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  17. A. I love, love, LOVE ramen. I’m so thankful to be living in close proximity to no fewer than four ramen restaurants.

    B. I’ve never shied away from treating myself to a sit-down meal. I want to say that’s a byproduct of being single in my late 30s post-divorce, but honestly, even before then I would do so. My ex didn’t enjoy some foods that I really liked, so it was either go out by myself or live a life void of them. I’m happy to have chosen the former.

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  19. I don’t like to eat alone. I guess because of my Italian roots, a meal is meant to be shared with people you care about. That makes it a pleasure. Eating alone is usually on the run and hurried not because you don’t want to treat yourself, but because it can be lonely.

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