Leah is a great teammate. At our wedding in 1992, I gave a toast in which I declared that my future bride… would be a great teammate. Marriage is about picking a person you want at your side to help navigate whatever might come along…The trip worked because Leah and I shared a vision of what we wanted to do, and then we shared responsibilities along the way.Charles Wheelan- We Came, We Saw, We Left
Is your partner a great teammate?
Is picking the right teammate the secret to a good relationship?
But then the question is- how do you pick the right teammate?
Remember back when we were kids- picking people for teams? You tried to find the biggest, strongest, fastest kid. Or if you were doing a group project, you tried to pick the smartest kid, or the best artist. Your goal was to get the kids with the most talent for whatever it was that you were doing. So how do you translate those skills to picking a lifemate?
I guess you have to take a long, hard look at what you think “winning” means to you. And then you have to factor in that people change- they might not always have the same goals that they started out with.
So, if you have goals of a house in the burbs, two kids, a dog, and eventually a ski house a few hours away, do you look for someone with those same goals? On your three month anniversary, do you start asking what this person you’re spending time with where they see themselves five years down the line?
Do you find someone who has no goals and will just go along with whatever you say?
Is picking the right teammate about picking someone that has strengths where you have weakness?
For example…does a disorganized person find someone who is organized? Does someone who is a free spender find someone who is frugal? Or is picking someone opposite your personality a recipe for disaster?
How do you pick a teammate for life?