Single Parents.

Now let me define single parents. They can be single by choice or by circumstance. They can also be part of a two parent household but jobs take one parent away for long periods of time, such as someone who is in the armed forces. It’s someone who holds down the fort alone, for any length of time.

But however you look at it, single parents inspire me.

I know how hard it is to be a parent when I have a co-parent. I know how exhausting and emotionally draining it can be, and I had someone to pick up the slack. But single parents…they really don’t. True, they probably have great support systems, but really, at 3am with a feverish kid, it’s just the one parent.

How they manage to hold down a job, make the lunches, help with the homework, get through the angst… it amazes me when I see people do it. I don’t know how I would have faired as a single parent…

So to all those single parents out there who just get it done, I salute you.

50 thoughts on “Bloganuary Day 6: Who is someone that inspires you, and why

      1. I can’t imagine either. In the summers we would rent a house at the beach to escape the Palm Springs heat. My husband would commute for weekends. This was when the kids were young. I was so exhausted Friday afternoons!

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  1. My wife traveled for work a lot when the kids were little. I gained an appreciation for single parent during those years. I could always look forward to Friday when she returned. I couldn’t imagine knowing Friday wouldn’t come.

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  2. Thanks for the single parent pat on the back. It’s appreciated. Yes being a single parent was really , really hard. I mean crazy tough. I think I’ve shared many times that I married young and when my oldest son was born in 1973 his father and I split up when he was ten months old. He moved to another state so I was on my own. And because it was the 70’s, public schools wouldn’t even let divorced women teach. It felt like I was wearing a scarlet letter on my chest except it was a D for divorced rather than A. Publicly the world looked at me like the divorce had to be my fault not my husbands. The world blamed the woman in cases like mine. But women do what we alway do, we persevere. And we do it well because we have to. I have no doubt LA that you would have been an excellent single parent if you had to be one. It’s your nature based on the way you write about your daughter. You would rise to the challenge because that’s what you needed to do. . Mostly single parents don’t have the time to think about anything other than putting one foot in front of the other. They keep going. So you would have survived just fine, although it wouldn’t have been easy. You’d take multiple jobs, go to drive throughs for dinners more than you wanted, but you would have figured it out. And BTW, Thank you for the acknowledgment . It means a lot to single moms! ❤️

    In my own life who do I admire? My oncologist first. He’s got magical surgeon hands, but mostly he has a heart that exudes kindness all while getting to the point and adjusting my treatment based on my individual needs . I remember after surgery at my 6 week checkup I grabbed his hands and thanked him for saving my life. He actually teared up. My son was also in the room and my sweet doctor told me I was making him cry . I know he’s a kind man. But he connected with my family very closely. I think he and my oldest son especially, clicked as they both are a lot alike. My son took me to every appointment and so my son, my doctor and moi all developed a bond of sorts. And when my youngest son would come down he was also in the mix. My doctor has told me multiple times what amazing kids I have. And he’s complimented me saying I raised such kind, articulate children. So I suppose being a single parent has its perks too. We are a close family. And I guess that shows. I never thought about until my doctor said something. I suppose the universe found me a special doctor who besides being a brilliant surgeon and doctor he can recognize how devoted my sons are. So Dr. Jonathan Black inspires me.

    But my two children inspire me as well. My oldest grew up without a dad and is still a very successful man who doesn’t hesitate to be there for his mom, his wife and his children. And my youngest son is incredible too. His father died of cancer when he was in college. That was tough. He drove home every weekend while his father was sick. His dad died shortly before he graduated. He too is successful in his career and also in kindness. Parenting is a crap shoot.. I got very lucky. My children inspire constantly.

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  3. When I was married, I was a single parent because he traveled a lot. When he abruptly left the family, again I was a single parent but without a semi-interested partner. We never really co-parented married or divorced (and certainly not after the divorce). So thanks for the salutations because it isn’t easy. However, I have a few divorced friends and we bounce discipline, parenting etc off of each other because I think it helps to have a village to rely on when needed. Single parenting when the ex is around is hard since he works against me and not for the kids. But I’ve been given liberation to it since they’re older now and they’ve seen beyond the narcissist veil that he employed to disguise his bad behavior.

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    1. I always love me some Ms Janie Leeds! I married my ex after he knocked me up after I’d made the conscious decision that I didn’t want to be a single parent. In the end, like Janie, that’s basically what I became! Looking back I can see that very clearly but when I was in it I subsumed a lot of my wants and needs into the single parenting that I was often “forced” into for reasons similar to Janie’s. When his job moved across the country I decided to drag the rest of us with him because I didn’t want to “break up the family.” Now, 15 years later, he tells me he really wanted to and expected me to reach the decision not to. I know the reason for that is that he didn’t and still doesn’t have the balls or the consideration to be honest with me. Good riddance to the duplicity and trying to make others responsible for his misery, as alcoholics are prone to do!

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      1. Always here as a a friend to those who need one! Mine was not an alcoholic, but a narcissist even though I didn’t realize it at the time. But I am glad you are freed and getting stronger and happier everyday! 🙂 Big hugs to you!

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  4. Funny story: When I graduated, I got a job in GA. I thought I could take care of the girls by myself, who were 9 and 11 at the time, because it seemed like my husband didn’t do much. I learned a valuable lesson those two years. Children need 2 parents for balance, and single parenting is hard as hell.

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  5. Someone who inspired me was my paternal grandmother. She was a lot like Betty White in that, she grew old with grace and an abundance of humor.

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  6. I sooo agree with you!! My husband was away due to his job for 3 months. I do not know how single parents do it, I felt like I was going to lose it by the end of 3 months! Yes, my friends and family were great over that time, but not having another adult in the house was just plain hard.

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  7. Some of the hardest times raising 3 boys alone. Only with Christ did we all survive each other. Thank you for sharing and shining a bright light on them as I too am inspired by single parents. Blessings, xo

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Thank you for your comment. it was difficult caring for my sick husband who suddenly died one morning leaving me to raise our young son alone. Through many hardships and difficulties, I raised Levi from childhood through his tweens- no easy feat.

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  9. I appreciate that. When I fell pregnant, I made a decision to bring my daughter up alone. I was fortunate in having supportive parents and siblings, but it was tough. My major bugbear was being treated as if I was stupid, a slut, a financial drain on the state, or looking for a “daddy for my baby”. I was none of those things. I worked full-time, I got stuff done, I was an organizing marvel. I pay for it now as I have little financial security. But I do have an amazing daughter who I couldn’t be more proud of. Being acknowledged is great – so thank you LA.

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