Three weeks ago, a good friend of ours had a massive heart attack/coronary episode. Unfortunately, last week he passed, leaving behind a wife and three children. To say we are inconsolable is an understatement.
My Husband worked with P about 15 years ago. Even though they have both gone on to different jobs, they remained good friends. P was just a great guy- it was impossible not to like and respect him.
Back during the pre vaccination days of COVID, P had invited us out to his house over the summer for a barbecue. We were unable to rent a car as renting a car during COVID became a real issue for us. My Husband was too scared to take the train. So at zero hour, my Husband decided to cancel on them. He was too afraid.
Do you know how that decision is looming over my Husband right now? How bad and horrible he feels about not going to his house?
While my Husband and P did get together a few times post vaccine, twice their plans were thwarted by weather: they had tickets to see the Mets, and of course the games got rained out.
I look at a recent text that I had sent to his wife- “Must have dinner soon…” YES!!!! she responded!… but life still has a way of sneaking up on you.
My Husband and I miscalculated. In thinking that time is infinite, we forgot the our time is finite. We are only here a short period of time. We don’t get to choose when we die. We only get to choose how we live. I still have the house gift I bought them last year, sitting in my closet, because I figured, “Oh- we’ll get out to their house soon…”
Get on the train to see your friends.
Buy tickets for more Met games.
Make the dinner plans.
Don’t be so afraid of dying that you become afraid to live.
As Snoopy so eloquently said, We only die once: but we live every day. Make it so.
I dedicate this post to Post to P. We will miss the passionate and spirited debates about current events. You were one of the few people we could have discussions about everything with, because even if you didn’t agree, you were always willing to listen. We will miss your wry and understated humor and how you made us laugh. We will miss your stories about your girls, every ounce of adoration in every word. We will miss seeing you and C together- couple goals if I’ve ever seen them. We will miss your impeccably made Moscow Mules. My Husband is going to miss the Met games and sharing 20 game packs with you. When I walked by The Lamb’s Club the other day, I couldn’t help but remember that as the last place the four of us were together- having one last drink after seeing Jagged Little Pill. How I wish for one more outing. How my Husband wishes for one more conversation. You will be missed so very greatly by those who knew you.
I wish for C and the girls to find the courage and strength to get through this.
Cherish the relationships that matter.