Parenting is hard….says my daughter.

She came to this realization this year, as she navigated parenting our puppy.

You need to watch what they eat

You need to pull things out of their mouths

You need to watch what they’re doing

You spend your days telling them No

You worry about them all the time

My daughter ended her diatribe with a question to me:

How did you parent me and not go crazy? Wait – not crazy because we aren’t supposed to use that word anymore. How did you parent me and still function every day?

I didn’t really have to think about the answer to that: You parent because you love. And love is stronger than anything else- except for maybe hate, but that’s a whole other post.

Parenting is a blessing and a curse. You get the opportunity to raise a child. You get to watch them grow and learn things and you get to see those adorable smiles and the tinkle of their giggles. You also get to wipe their butt after they poop. You get to smell them when they go through the adolescent phase of not showering. You get to hear them berate you.

So how do we parent and still function?

We remind ourselves that parenting a child is a privilege. When you have the opportunity to raise a child it is a gift. We know that even though there are some rocky moments, there is so much joy to be had with a child.

Being a parent is being an eternal optimist. When there are issues, it’s keeping the positive attitude that things will get better. It’s reminding ourselves of all the good moments of the past, and if we can just hold on a little, we will see more good moments ahead.

Being a parent is hard. It is the hardest thing I’ve ever done. It has also been worth every moment: both good and bad.

64 thoughts on “Parenting is Hard

  1. Yes, just holding on is sometimes all we can do. My daughter (who has a 6 year old, 4 year old, 2 year old, and 7 month old), commented that she can’t wait until they’re older and she’ll finally get sleep. I had to be the bearer of bad news. Not going to happen! You lose sleep when they become teenagers and she’s going to have a few at the same time! And sometimes you lose sleep when they’re adults because everything is completely out of your hands. It is quite a ride, sometimes scary, but the thrill is always worth it in the end!

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    1. Nah. I don’t tell her what to think or how to think it. And personally I worry about my pets a lot. I trust far fewer people to watch my pets than I did my daughter.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Actually I thought it was a great analogy. It shows she’s thinking about how hard and how much there is to raising a child. As most people don’t, as most people assume it’s easy, or it’s their right to have a child, I’m happy she’s thinking. Lots of crappy parents out there who don’t give parenting a thought at all. It’s far worse to never make the connection that it’s hard…no matter how it is you get there

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      2. Yes , very good that she’s thinking ! I agree that humans treat their pets like children , but hopefully they don’t treat their children like pets . And yes, I’ve seen children treated worse than animals . (Awful case in the news this week in Houston. ) Having a pet is a good way to teach caregiving and responsibly, but having a baby is so different.

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  2. I love this post, LA. I agree. Parenting is extremely difficult, yet, it is also a wonder. When I reflect back on the boys being little, and me, and my ex wife, not knowing anything about being parents, we were so scared, and, yet, we did make it – and, that’s just it I think. Knowing that it’s going to be hard, your going to cry, get angry, be frustrated, insert all other emotions here, and at the same time, you are going to have your heart filled like never before. A gift.

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  3. Beautifully put. Yes, We do it because we love. ❤️
    It’s very sweet that your daughter came to the realization that parenting is difficult. That’s a great lesson. My oldest grand daughter is in college now. But when she started high school my son called me one morning after dropping her off at school. He said. “ I just want to apologize for being such a pain as a teenager. “
    I burst out laughing. Keep in mind, he was a moody teen, but a good kid. He got excellent grades, was a scholar athlete and won lots of awards, but he was still a teenager! And he told me that now that he had a moody teenager of his own, he realized how he must have been a real pain in the behind. I said, yeah, sometimes he was. But mostly he wasn’t. And I reassured him that his daughter would outgrow being moody. It’s a natural part of growing up.
    Yes, parenting Is indeed a gift. But yeah, it’s really, really hard. And we all just try our best.

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      1. Exactly! And we think kids are going to be like a self help book. Nope. They don’t fit into categories. They are all unique. And they don’t always respond like we think they will. It’s all a bit of a “crap” shoot! You throw the dice and hope! 🤞🏼😉

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  4. Same.
    I’m in the teen trenches now but honestly, it doesn’t feel so trench-like as often anymore. I observe their growth and evolution into an adult with awe and respect but from a point of wisdom and knowledge. And love. Not matter what. .

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  5. I’m a little terrified of becoming a parent someday. Having a pet dog makes my heart ache with love and worry. A child would be that times a trillion. I don’t know if my heart can handle it.

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  6. So wise. I think my favorite moments are the times when they come to me and say, “Mom, you were right.” – LOL. I know the reason we didn’t have a pet until the kids were grown is because I knew it was going to be just as hard and I had enough to do with the three of them.

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    1. When we got our first dog my daughter was in kindergarten so I did everything. This time I made her do the lion share Whalen she was home. She got a dose of reality

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Parenting is hard and rewarding. I’m so thankful that I stayed home and put my career aside to be a mom. I know plenty of parents who worked and did a great job. They don’t love their children any less, but I’m thankful for my choice.

    Liked by 3 people

  8. Wonderful post, but I almost got stuck on the part where we aren’t supposed to use the term “crazy.” I am so over the PC police. I get that you shouldn’t call someone crazy; that is rude. I understand that there are specific terms that one can use to explain someone’s mental health, although I think the instances where you should be discussing someone’s mental or physical health are limited. I do think the term crazy does not need to be eliminated from our vocabulary. I think you should be able to say “the noise from that jackhammer is driving me crazy” or “that is crazy for those teenagers to run around the car at a stoplight.” Maybe I am just reflecting my age, but then I suppose if you agree with that, then you are guilty of “seniorism.”😉

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  9. You don’t know how much you made my heart cry with gladness with your post. I thought of my Darling mother and how much she has gone through and still does to look out for us even if we are adults now and living our own different lives… She’s still a mother on call, managing everything for her children in all their different lives when called upon. It’s like she never tires even if am old enough now to know that she does, but Motherhood is a Duty that never ends for as long as the children still are. Thank you very much❤️🙏🏿☺️ May the Lord bless all Mothers and Fathers. I Love you Mother wherever you are❤️☺️

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Yes , it’s not easy but being a parents are the best happiness in life. When you are going through with a lot of problems by the time you see a smile on your kids face, it give energy to fight. Also when you see your kids graduate and thanked their parents, that’s wonderful. Even i don’t have words to express that happiness.

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  11. Babies and old people. I guess you can add pets to the list of animate objects that need care but cannot communicate those needs to the caregiver. I told my kids I had them to take care of me in their old age. More recently I’ve told them that caring for their pets is good prep for taking care of their own kids down the road.

    Their individual responses surprised me in that the one that I thought for sure would want to have kids doesn’t seem to care much if she does or doesn’t. The more difficult one surprised me with an opposite response.

    Guess it’s a good thing I didn’t put my mom’s curse on either one – that they should have a child who is just like them. Looking back and having that thought in the back of my mind made me realize why I was surprised!

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