Rule of thirds: we talked about this yesterday. When you are trying to achieve a goal, you will be great 1/3 of the time, Okay a third, and crappy a third. (Alexi Pappas- Bravey) We debated if we thought this was a good ratio of good times to bad.

Somewhere in the discussion with Deb, I thought about Motherhood. (FYI- Deb has probably motivated more blogs than anyone else) As Deb and I were talking, I realized that motherhood is clearly part of the rule of thirds.

The great part? Well, that’s easy. Think about all those pictures on your phone, or in an album somewhere. Looking in my house is like a highlight reel of the great moments: artwork framed on my wall, pictures in cap and gown, certificates and trophies. These are all those moments that we think about when we decide to make Motherhood our goal.

I smile at the picture of “My first Haircut” where my daughter sits in the high chair and I clip her bangs. Who doesn’t love a “first” of something…it’s the beginning of the milestone. First day of school pics that my daughter stood patiently for every single year. Firsts, beginnings holding so much promise. I look on her window ledge and see a lifetime of trophies from things she has excelled at: Chess and and tennis and debate and law team. I remember cheering and crying when her little league softball team won the championship. I remember cheering and crying as she accepted the Pinstripe Bowl Scholar Athlete award at Yankee Stadium. The college acceptance letter. These are the moments you think about as you are carrying or adopting your child before they are even born. You can’t help but imagine the wonderful experiences that your child will have as they figure out who they are.

The quiet moments of reading “Goodnight Moon as their eyes get heavy. The tea parties on the living room floor. The times they add the chips into the cookie dough. Walking hand in hand with them as they skip a little bit. These are probably the greatest of the great moments- just you and your child and everyone is happy and you are just in the moment.

But on the road there, we have a lot of ennui. Sitting at the practices waiting for your kid to finish up. Rereading their opening statement for the Mock Trial competition a thousand and one times. Hearing them try to play “Smoke on the Water” first on recorder, and then on the clarinet, and then on the guitar….unless your child is a musical prodigy, there is no way you do not want to cut off your ears when they practice.

There’s the boredom that comes with the day to day, the rote of getting them out of bed, dressed, breakfast, make sure they have all their stuff, get them to school, come home and do homework, brush the teeth…rinse…repeat…how fondly do you remember reminding them if they have their gym uniform?

OF course…we have those moments that make you question why you became a parent. Colic….the dreaded hours between 4 and 6pm when they might just cry. Or the waking up in the middle of the night. The look of the new parent is a clever mix at awe in what they created, and shock at surviving on as little sleep as they do.

The toddler years. Who doesn’t love bolting down furniture and locking everything that opens. Ever try one of those toilet locks at 3am?

The years when your kid is struggling to find their place in the world?

When they lose a game or a competition or a friend?

When they hurt so bad that you feel like you are empty because you don’t want to see your child hurt so much?

The tween years….yeah…who doesn’t love the onset of puberty?

The teen years…rebels who think they have a cause?

Yup.

1/3 great

1/3 okay

1/3 crappy

But…

Wow…

It’s worth it.

Congratulations to everyone, whether or not they are a Mother, who has parented a child. It is not the goal of everyone, but to those who choose it, I salute you.

59 thoughts on “Anything Can Happen Friday: Mother’s Day Edition”

  4. “Smoke on the Water” on a recorder? 😂 Holy ear-plugs!! I thought I had (literally) heard it all, but I guess I was spared from a few things..HAHA!!!!– Happy Mother’s Day! 💜

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  7. Your blog brought tears to my eyes. All those years, both good and bad, go by so quickly. I cherish all those precious moments and continue to do so with my daughter and grandchildren. Happy Mother’s Day!

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  16. Beautiful post. You captured motherhood so well. Little did I know that this past year would be one of the most difficult for me. Harder than any before. Which means that you never stop being a mother.

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  23. Totally totally appropriate to describe mothering and in the best cases just parenting in general. Most of the time, though, let’s just face it that mothers generally take the third/third/third route based on priority of the task in our lives vs that of fathers.

    Either way, parenting is the hardest job in the world for which most training is OJT. I just love that thought, and it is especially true if you have more than one kid. For me. any day that I’m with my kids is Mother’s Day. This means I really haven’t had any holidays of any sort for the last year and a half and who knows how much longer that will last.

    That’s my situation because my adult kids live in MI while I’m living in my childhood home with my mom who has Alzheimer’s while I am concurrently waiting for my TN divorce to be completed. Mom remembers every “holiday” and is offended if she doesn’t receive cards or at least greetings for every one, even today when she barely remembers anything. I think the shallowness of her approach to the “holidays” is what has caused me to look at them, especially birthdays, as just another day.

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