Highlights??? March 21

So as I spent much of the past week trying not to be dizzy…

Fun Fact: do you know how tea light candles got their name? Because they used to sit under tea pots to keep the contents of the pot warm. How cool is that? I’m going to have to buy myself the apparatus that contains the candle that you can put the pot on…

I saw this Instagram post yesterday. As I sit here and listen to how we are supposed to respect one another, I see yet another example of how people are still figuring out ways to separate us. I could look at this a number of ways:

  1. Why do we put things in columns unless we are going to compare things?
  2. Why must we label people extroverts and introverts?
  3. Why do people assume that introverts are bumbling idiots incapable of using a phone properly?
  4. Why do people assume that introverts are scared of their own shadow?
  5. A true introvert would probably use an app to order
  6. Do extroverts really think they are better than introverts?

According to New Oxford, the definition of introvert is:

shy, reticent person

but right below this definition, with a bullet point is the following:

psychology- a person predominantly concerned with their own thoughts and feelings rather than with external things

For all my introverted friends- which definition do you think is most right?

While true that some introverts are shy and reticent, I’m willing to bet that all introverts are the second definition…

Maybe PureWow should stop their rather pedestrian attempts at humor and start seeing people as the unique individuals that they are.

Stop labeling.

Stop looking for differences.

Stop marginalizing.

And slowly…I begin to get back to my particular band of normal…

Gratitude Saturday March 20

Let’s see…do I have anything to be grateful for this week?

  1. Good health
  2. I only ate hospital food for one day
  3. My family finally hung up my coat which had been on the chair since Sunday
  4. blogging family willing to take me in on my tour
  5. ability to sit at my computer without tilting left
  6. HBO MAX
  7. extra wide egg noodles with butter
  8. youtube tutorials of Brandt-Daroff exercises
  9. drugs to get me in MRI
  10. March Madness

Anything Really Can Happen….

Hi All.

First off- Thank you to everyone who has checked up on me! I appreciate it more than you know. In fact, as I now hate my family, I may take turns living with you all…

Most of you know the basics- woke up with debilitating vertigo on Sunday. Thought I was having a stroke because I read one too many articles about women who do not realize what is happening. Good news: No stroke or brain tumor (I have a friend who actually had a brain tumor so I realize that this is something that actually happens to real people and not just on Grey’s Anatomy) No heart attack. And on the up side, they took so many tests I can actually say that my health is actually pretty good. Except for the extreme vertigo that is.

Sunday is a complete blur to me. I am claustrophobic so they gave me so much medicine so I could go into the MRI machine. To say that I remember nothing is an understatement. My daughter just told me that I had an entire conversation with her about a book we had both read and I. Remember. Nothing.

Apparently I also had a dream where I was boxing because as the Doctor woke me up I guess I was saying “I’m jabbing. I’m jabbing.”

So apologies if I texted or emailed any of you on Sunday…

The biggest issue that I have is that I have been unable to read much. I read a bit yesterday, but that was really first time I did since Saturday. I’m also afraid to put earbuds in or headphones on so audible books are out as well. I have been binge watching “The Big Bang Theory” on HBOMAX. It’s comfort food because I don’t need to pay attention as I’ve watched it all before.

I’ve missed all of you and blogging and hope that this is the first of more posts! I don’t think you will get a Highlights post because really, do you need to see pics of my watching Big Bang?

One thing of note is that my daughter started an Instagram account for Betty.


I promise more pictures of my poor dog in costume…

Going to rearrange my blogging schedule (can I just tell you how annoyed I am at having to reschedule posts?) and at some point I will go into greater detail about my experiences this week, and hopefully I will remember more…#thisiswhyIdon’tdodrugs

Monday March 15

Hi all,

In the middle of the night Saturday/Sunday I woke up to go to the bathroom. I found that I had incredible vertigo and ended up going to the emergency room.

After spending the day there, and having multiple scans including an MRI, CT scan and X-rays, I was found to not have anything major like a stroke, heart attack or brain tumor.

That’s good news,

The other thing is that they’re not conclusive as to what is causing the vertigo,

Presently I’m a home and awaiting a vertigo medicine that will help ear crystals, which is the conclusion they’ve come to. I have to start physical therapy next week. Apparently this is quite common.

I am going to take a few days off writing to process all this.

See you soon!


Gratitude Saturday March 13

Two weeks ago my Father was able to get his first vaccine shot. Pfizer.

Yesterday my Husband was able to get his first vaccine shot. Moderna.

I am grateful to all those who have worked incredibly hard over the past year to come up with vaccines.

I am grateful to all those who chose to participate in drug trials.

I am grateful to all those who have assisted in distributing the vaccine.

I am grateful to all the people staffing the vaccine centers.

I am also grateful that my husband has asthma.

I am grateful that we are all on our way to some sort of normal.

Hoping for podcast recording soon!

Anything Can Happen Friday- Tina Fey

TIna Fey is primarily knows as the creator of TV show “30 Rock” and movie “Mean Girls”, her memoir “Bossypants” and her lampooning of a conservative woman on SNL.

In June of 2020, Tina Fey voluntarily pulled 4 episodes of her TV show “30 Rock” from Netflix. At least one of these shows highlighted a character in blackface. She apologized for her insensitive behavior towards black people. “30 Rock” ran from 2006 to 2013.

Apparently, there are also episodes of “30 Rock” that contained stereotypes of Asians. To my knowledge, these shows have also been removed. If they were removed it was to much less fanfare because to my knowledge, she has never issued a statement regarding her treatment of Asians and subsequent stereotypes. Alas, as I have never watched “30 Rock” I have no personal knowledge of what any episode contained.

In Fey’s 2004 movie “Mean Girls”, Fey once again employed the use of Asian stereotypes. “Mean GIrls” continues to be shown on Network TV as well as streaming services. I have seen this movie and I did enjoy it. The movie is roughly based on the book “Queen Bees and Wannabees”.

When I originally watched the movie, I thought Fey was on the side of the plucky young women who had been plagued by the “mean girls”. In hindsight, I’m not so sure which side she is actually on.

As this show and it’s stereotypes are still available, perhaps “Mean Girls” should come with a disclaimer (you know, like The Muppets and The Aristocats have)

“Mean Girls” was created in 2004. At this time, we were not as culturally as sensitive to the use of Asian stereotypes as we are today. Sorry. We just didn’t know any better back then.

You know…cause it was in the 21st Century….

BTW- Fey cohosted The Golden Globes on February 28, 2021.

When NYC Mayor DeBlasio ran for reelection, one of his campaign promises was to make NYC Specialized High Schools (entrance to these High Schools is based on a certain score on the SHSAT) more accessible to minorities and persons of color. This is a wonderful sentiment. The problem is, New York Cities specialized high schools are already predominantly minority/POC. They are mainly Asian.

In 2020, the Oregon DOE instructed teachers to use the manual “A Pathway to Equitable Math Instruction”. This is supposed to make math education better for all. The booklet talks about whites and blacks and Latinx. The booklet fails to mention Asians at all. There is a label “multilingual” but are we still marginalizing an entire race of immigrants by not even giving them a name?


So as you read the above, did any of you think-

Well, Asians don’t need _________ because Asians are insert Asian stereotype here

See how easy it is to stereotype? Even in the 21st century…

Never fear…

Racism might not be the end of us.

But hypocrisy….

That’s another story.


Sentimental Journey

I am not sentimental.

From Oxford Languages we get sentimental as “of or prompted by feelings of tenderness, sadness or nostalgia”

So what does it mean when I say that I am not sentimental? Does it mean that I am never prompted by these feelings?

Well yes. And no.

My walls are covered with framed drawing that my daughter did in elementary school. I have a portfolio filled with snippets of her work from middle school and some of high school. I have a folder in my email box with the letters of things that she has won. These things make me happy. They could also fit in a medium sized box.

I have pictures of my friends on my desk and shelf. I have one trinket that my Mom gave me and one trinket that my Dad gave me on a shelf in my bedroom. On that same shelf sits a few ornamental cats that my Husband bought me on our first vacation together and our honeymoon. Above my vanity sits an old Mother’s Day card from my daughter. In my nightstand sits a tee shirt from a treasured friend whom I don’t get to see very often.

I am sentimental about this handful of things. These things have meaning for me. Two medium sized boxes of goods.

I am sentimental about my memories. Doesn’t everyone love a good memory?

But I refuse to live in the past. I am pretty happy living in the present.

I think that is were the difference lies: some people prefer to think back over the past moments of their lives. There is nothing wrong with that. It’s just not me.

There are also people who are constantly living in the future. When I was in High School, my best friends family was constantly telling her things like: “Sure. Person X has a 10 speed bike now. But will her family be able to pay for college?” They were so hyper focused on preparing for the future that they didn’t leave anything for the present. I’m not telling people how to spend their money. But, you know…balance…FYI- not a sentimental bone in these people’s bodies.

How do you define sentimental? If you were writing a book and you wanted your character to be sentimental, how would you describe the character? What adjectives would you use? What devices would you employ to prove to the reader that you want this character to be sentimental?

Do you think you are sentimental? Do you ever wish you were more or less sentimental?

The definition I stated referred to sentimental as “sad”. Do you think sad when you think sentimental?

Give me 25 words or less on sentimental…


A Blessing and a Curse

There used to be a TV show Monk. Monk had amazing observational skills but as these skills came along with 3 times a week therapy and a rather large dose of OCD. He would often be heard saying “It’s a blessing/gift and a curse.

There are traits that we have that are awesome to have, like observational skills. At the same time, as one is living with them all the time, they can also be a curse. Too much of anything is bad, especially if you can’t ever unsee, or unfeel something.

What is my blessing and curse? Thinking of course. I think of things that no one else does: it’s a blessing. I think of things no one else does: it’s a curse…

Out of all the stupid things that I do and say on my blog and in my life, I rarely get comments about them. But if I think a little too hard about something…if I peel back the curtain and you see the side of the wizard…if I focus on one little germ of something that people are trying to keep to the background….people question me.

Don’t you think you’re overthinking ______________?

Why are you thinking that?

The other day I commented on my sister’s Facebook post. Do you know the answer someone gave me?

“Those are not things for us to think about.”

Of course I hear the words- “It’s not our place to to question the thoughts that people in high ranking places make” (which was the context that this comment most closely aligns with) I immediately think: Gee- isn’t that what a bunch of people said in Nazi Germany- you know they were just following orders and all…

But there I go thinking again…

There I go making comparisons again…(FYI- comparisons- blessing and a curse)

Why do people have problems with my thinking?

Outside of trolls, the most negative comments I receive on my blog and in my personal life have to do with my thinking…

I find it funny that people now want to censor what one thinks in their head…

I find it odd that people don’t really like those who are curious, who question things..,

They don’t really like people who can connect the dots, who see patterns in things…

Because people who can do things like this are a little bit scary…they’re a tad unusual.

And as a society we still have problems with those who are different.

Now we’ve discussed my personal issues, let’s think about yours (no pun intended)

What thing in your life is a blessing and a curse? What is a trait that is so inherently you, yet at times it can be more of a drain?



NoteI have not had the opportunity to record a podcast because I have not have the opportunity record in a quiet spot. Hoping to have at least one included to tomorrow if you are inclined to listen.

Mom Shame

My Daughter is 19, so she has come of age with the influencer/vlogger generation. There is many a lifestyle personality that my daughter has followed on YouTube, many a live event she has attended and many a book she has bought.

As with all the things, as she has grown up and gone onto face different challenges, so have these vloggers. One vlogger that she followed for a while has recently become a Mother.

Instead of posting pics of how to decorate your first apartment and mall hauls, this vlogger now shows Mommy/baby things. This is a natural move: do you know how much money there is in baby paraphernalia?

Recently this vlogger posted a video of the home made baby food she had made for her child, who was about a year old I think. Along with the comments about how did you make that food, there were also comments of wow- could you feed that baby a little bit more and if you feed the baby that much they are going to become fat because the quantities she showed feeding her child were considered rather large.


Of course we can ask why the vlogger is sharing their life with us at all, but that’s a silly question to pose in 21st century world where people make their living by streaming pretty much everything they do all day. Vlogging your day to day is a thing.

Voyeurs by nature, people subscribe to these channels. GenZ and Millennials are reaching out to one another through social media. The internet is the community rec center, the church basement. the scouts for the new age.

But with the people who find this just plain entertaining, and the people who want to emulate a lifestyle, you also have the people who want to shoot you down.

Along with a tiny bit of voyeurism comes a tiny bit of mean. People can’t help but be mean to one another. For every positive comment this vlogger received was a negative comment. People interfering with what this Mom is doing.

Just because you have a presence on social media, does it mean that others are allowed to attack you?

In the 21st century, is this how we have learned to treat others who are different than ourselves?

In the 21st century is this how we have learned to treat others who do things differently than we do?

Should we ever be attacking anyone’s personal choice as to how and when they feed their child?

Should we ever be Mom shaming?

Fifty, one hundred years from now, what will history have to say about trolling and online shaming?

Is this the best that we can be?