Last week I talked about trolls…
After my post, I realized that there are times that I could have been considered a troll. Tell me if you feel any of these things brings me into trollworld… FYI- I did not have an actual rapport with any of these bloggers.
- A blogger once wrote that Manhattan is a suburb of New York City. This is not a true statement. Fact: New York City is made up of five boroughs: Manhattan, Brooklyn, Bronx, Queens and Staten Island. A suburb of NYC could be Mineola in Nassau County, Rye in Westchester County, Montclair in New Jersey or Stamford in Connecticut. I commented on the bloggers site that she gave out factually incorrect information. Was I being a troll?
- One Mom blogger wrote that you should never tell your children that you love them straight out, ie. “I love you.” She said that you should always say things with qualifiers, like “I love you because you are strong.” or I love you because you are smart.” I told her that I thought that children should be loved unconditionally and should be told “I love you” without any reason. My daughter was I think in 11th grade and I told the blogger that when my daughter left the house every day I still told her that I loved her. Was I being a troll?
- One Mom blogger stated that you should strive to be your child’s friend, because you must be able to empathize and remember what it was like to be a child. Now, anyone who knows me knows that my number rule of parenting is that YOU CAN BE FRIENDLY WITH YOUR CHILD BUT YOUR JOB IS TO PARENT. I told the blogger to tread that line really carefully because a kid needs a parent, needs someone to set boundaries and be there when they fall. Was I being a troll?
- Twice I read posts about how good virtual schooling is and how we should consider making that permanent. While I think we are doing the best that we can, I don’t think in any way, shape or form should we ever consider virtual schooling for the masses. And I told both of these bloggers this. Was I being a troll?
So…
What do you think?
Troll or not?
Trolls comment to start an argument. You were stating your opinion or the fact about boroughs not being suburbs. Trolls usually want to seed distrust and fighting.
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But would the bloggers themselves have considered me a troll. In all of these instances except one, the blogger did not respond
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Are you a regular reader and comment regularly on the blog? If so I would not consider you a troll.
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Of these blogs no. But I don’t comment often. These comments made me so mad I had to say something
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Some people cannot handle a respectful debate.
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True
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Nope, this does not sound like trollish behaviour 🙂
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😉
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I think it would depend on how you said it. Was it in a “here’s my opinion” way or was it in a “I think you are a moron” way.
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Most of the: were in my opinion mode. The one about how you say I love you to your child was definitely done with tone. I kept thinking about the kid who felt they needed to earn their mothers love
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I don’t think your intention was to wreak havoc on the bloggers lives. A blog is an opinion. Bloggers want readers, and have to accept some opposing opinions.
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That’s how I’ve always thought of it. The format is open to people disagreeing with you. Yet….
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Not a troll. You weren’t there to start a fight or be generally awful. If they didn’t comment back, it doesn’t mean you’re a troll.
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This is one of those moments where I get too into my own head and overthink it.
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Get out of your head! They were just comments on a blog!
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I know…but this is how I sabotage myself…years later and I’m still thinking about it…I know…it’s crazy…
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I don’t think you were a troll, unless you accompanied your opinions with name-calling and personal attacks or harsh judgments–which doesn’t sound like you, LA. Trolls attack people, not ideas. If someone felt attacked because their opinions were challenged, they probably aren’t all that secure in their opinions.
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Good point
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I don’t think any of your reactions to these situations is troll-like. Offering an opinion is part of the give and take of the social compact.
To me, a troll is one who harangues or becomes verbally abusive. Maybe I’m wrong??
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I agree, but as Kim pointed out I’m totally overthinking this
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But, overthinking is our modus operandi. 😉
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You got that right…
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It’s too bad we don’t get paid fir that particular skill.
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I’m waiting to see a job description of thinks so much becomes paralyzed and stuck
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Mine would need to say: Seeking overthinker who often reacts impulsively then spends an inordinate amount of time regretting said action.”
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Ha…🤔
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I don’t think you were a troll. If so, then I have been considered a troll also. Correcting misinformation is not troll like.
In one of my former blogging lives I used to do that occasionally on food/nutrition blogs. I did it on a few book review posts—it made me think people were intentionally trying to deceive others with misinformation.
Also I have a long history of taking antidepressants on and off. I comment on those blogs occasionally when people spout nonsense about antidepressants being unnecessary.
I have my blog set to private for now. I am thinking about deleting it or starting over or at least deleting some posts. People probably think I am a troll if I comment and they can’t see my blog. Still love reading others’ blogs—just haven’t had time to work on my own.
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That’s just it…when you here something that could be damaging or misleading, the urge to point it out is just there. When the mother basically stated that there should be conditions to love I pretty much freaked out. All I could think of was those poor kids just trying anything to get their mothers love….
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That was a scary statement for that mom to make. Where do people get those ideas?
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I didn’t get her point at all! And having grown up with a mother who treated me as if love were conditional, it just screamed at me…
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Isn’t a blog here to exchange ideas and perspectives? If that’s done in a manner that is not offensive or rude or obnoxious or otherwise derogatory, then that’s win, no? Especially if you have a global presence with different cultures reading and commenting?
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I always think this, but, I just don’t know
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No, LA, you were not being a troll, and the bloggers wouldn’t have thought you were. You need to be rude and condescending to be a troll!
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I fully admit that I might not have been nice in regards to the women who basically stated that love is conditional…
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Lol. Hmm, well, OK, maybe a semi-troll-in-training! 😉
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😉🤔
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First of all, I agree 100% with all of your examples. Therefore, IMHO you cannot be a troll because you were right and they were wrong. 😂
Regardless, I think people need to learn how to engage in respectful debate. One of the best ways to grow is through a dialogue of diverse thought/opinions. If people can’t handle it, then tell f#*k them. JK. Now that’s trolling!! 😅😂😉
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First 0ff- this ended up in SPAM for some reason…but I agree that we should be able to intelligently disagree with someone and allow ourselves to speak our minds
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No
No
No
No
Re virtual school – I think it’s nice to have the option. Like, simultaneous synchronized learning for when someone is sick or maybe less mobile (i.e. broken bones, surgery keeping you otherwise mentally capable of doing something to pass the time, tending to personal situations)…Covid has been an eyeopening experience with the whole WFH or school from home thing, and going forward, I don’t see it being a bad idea to keep both options as options. But, no, I would hate to see virtual school take over full time indefinitely.
Just yesterday I was thinking, my 8th and 10th graders have little experience with school dances. I mean, love or hate them, it’s part of high school, no?
We shall see what 2021 and beyond brings.
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Hoping for better days
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I don’t think so. You were commenting on a post. You gave your opinion. I don’t think you were out to start an argument or looking for someone to pick on like Trolls do.
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Thank you!
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Unfortunately, these days, many are loathe to express our feelings or opinions because we everyone is either fragile to the point of emotional collapse or agitated to the point of arguing over everything. I’ll admit it, I keep almost everything to myself..almost. It’s super boring that way, but also super safe.
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I know. So many of us walk on eggshells…
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No you are not a Troll…………. and I can tell you for fact my sibling ‘in no way shape or form’ wishes to homeschool online!
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………….neither do his daughters wish to be schooled virtually online, but I fear education authorities may choose this as a money saving option. Awful idea.
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I know
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It’s an option but should not be the norm
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We are all entitled to opinions though these days many of us live in fear of expressing them. This is a platform that allows us to do so. It’s the diversity of opinions which make it such an interesting place and can be a huge learning tool. 🤪
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I love the diversity of opinions. Yet, I don’t want to hurt people…
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I dont think so. You were trying to help the person. Constructive criticism. If I’m wrong
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I would tell you if I thought you said something odd, but you always write with a level head
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I would hope you tell me.
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Not a troll. Simply expressing logical opinions based on your experience without trying to stir up conflict.
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I don’t often comment…but these were just too much for me
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If giving your honest opinion is trolling, well…we’re all living under the bridge 😉
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😉
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Absolutely not. If people can’t handle the truth or honest opinion, they need to get a new life or follow their fantasy. Whatever! So glad the weekend is here!
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💗
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Nope, you offered a differing opinion. If your intention is to create animosity by shoving your opinion down the bloggers throat with an angry intensity, then you are a troll.
…
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It was more I couldn’t believe they said these things…
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Well, again what you did wasn’t trolling
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No, and I totally agree with you about the love thing. What crap. Also, the New York thing, I had no idea that was how New York was so I would welcome that info.
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Right? Wasn’t that a ridiculous statement?
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No. Just plain no. Expressing opinions respectfully is much different than trolling.
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I agree, but I do wonder what the bloggers thought?
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If they didn’t answer you, it’s hard to know, but I wouldn’t worry about it. If they checked out your site they would see that you are a respected blogger into discussion -like topics.
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Again, newby blogger here. However, from what I’ve experienced, people that troll other people’s blogs are looking for confrontation of some kind. I don’t believe your comments were confrontational. It is possible that these folks were not interested in a healthy debate. So, I say no, not trolling. Have a great weekend, LA.
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I definitely don’t consider your comments as being troll-like. I hesitate now to point out misstatements of fact when I perceive it as unintentional and insignificant, even if it tends to grate on me. I consider that my problem, not theirs. But having a contrary opinion on a more subjective matter (and isn’t love about as subjective as it gets?), is worthy of comment and not trolling at all. Isn’t that what blogs are for?
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That’s what I thought, and as Kim pointed out I am totally overthinking this, but I guess that’s what we do on blogs as well!
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The first one is the most troll-like, but hardly qualifies. At worst, you’d be a Karen. 🙂
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You know…I should write about Karen’s….
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You should!
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You know I just started scheduling posts for March? So expect a karen post then….
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😀 I’ll try to remember to look out for it.
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😉
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My verdict? NOT a troll.
I don’t believe we’re friends with our kids. We’re parents to our kids. If I walked in their room and caught them smoking weed, I’m not going to ask for a tug. Parenting is responsibility. You’ve got to teach accountability and that ain’t happening if you’re chums.
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That’s totally my unapologetic opinion. They have friends. They need parents
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I agree, no apologies necessary.
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No I don’t think you were being a troll. I think you shared wise words that needed to be said.
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Thank you
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There’s a line between expressing thoughts/opinions and trolling.
Is it a fine line? Is it a chasm? *shrugs*
These examples don’t read troll-like to me. You’re not out there actively (forgive me) trolling, hell bent on causing chaos and trouble. You’re expressing differing thoughts to those read. Except for the NYC one…that’s you calling out straight bulls**t and providing facts.
Expressing your opinions in a respectful way with honest intentions is not trolling.
You could choose not to have an opinion. You could choose not to express your opinion. But I feel like your head might explode if you did. 😉
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Could you imagine me never giving an opinion?
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Not in a million years! 😂😘
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Right?
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You weren’t a troll at all! Politely disagreeing is just conversation, and people have the ability to do that on other people’s blogs. Trolls are those who attack others, whether the writer of the blog or the others who wrote comments. They deliberately stir up trouble for reasons of their own. Unless you were rude, I can’t imagine you were, you did nothing wrong! (If I remember correctly, you and I once disagreed about the importance of getting into a top-tier school. And we both simply politely stated our opinions, which is why I’m always happy to see a comment from you on my blog and I hope you feel the same way about me!)
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I love a healthy disagreement. Without that I would never learn anything
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I am so happy I can get back on your blog. You are not a troll. I think any blogger who thinks a person with an opinion is a troll shouldn’t be a blogger. I find there are a lot of self centered people with zero life experience or common sense who think they have valuable knowledge to shave. They don’t. And those people shouldn’t be bloggers.
You are not a troll. And any mom who can’t just say I love you is nuts. Her children are always going to expect some form of praise when they grow up and get out into the world. She’s giving them an unrealistic view of the real world. Plus love has nothing to do with praise.
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The love comment just killed me. I couldn’t imagine saying that to a kid. I had to comment on it
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I’m glad you commented on it. That person had a warped view of how to show love in my opinion!
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I kept thinking if the poor kids trying to get their mothers attention
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Yeah, it’s rather heartbreaking. And the saddest thing is she thinks she’s doing right by her kids. And clearly she isn’t .
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I know
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Nah. Just putting in your two cents, which from the looks of it was worth two bucks at least.
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😉
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Not! And this would have made a good poll, too. Am I now trolling you?
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Not at all! Your comments are insightful and add to the conversation!!
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Not a troll at all. I actually agree with you on all of the above. But we all live different experiences and our opinions and beliefs reflect that 🙂
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Thanks!
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