My Uncle had two unsuccessful attempts to marriage. The first was to his high school sweetheart. He really did love her- he just got married too young. The second was a foolish mistake because I think he was lonely and she was desperate for a step father for her child. I don’t think that lasted six months. Then he met D, and they started dating.
And they dated.
Never moving in together.
For twenty years.
After two failed marriages, my Uncle was wary of pieces of paper connecting people legally. Plus, he and D got along really well, except when they didn’t.
They both did well financially- he’s a Doctor and she was flipping houses long before it was fashionable on HGTV. He is a car and motorcycle enthusiast who loves a good car show and trip around an engine. He treats his body as a temple with an intensive workout routine of weights and cardio and yoga. He loves music and plays guitar in a band of other Doctors, and attends concerts whenever possible. D was opposite in many ways. She loves a good drink and a better party. As well as her mid atlantic residence, she also maintained a condo in a southern state, enjoying her weekends on the beach, meeting as many new people as she could. She was a total people person.
They loved one another, but had their moments when his quiet solitude didn’t mesh with her boisterous joie de vivre.
But no marriage. Twenty years.
About eight months ago, D was diagnosed with cancer. Stage 4 lung, with some secondary spots. You can guess the prognosis…
So in April 2020, in the midst of the pandemic, my uncle and D got married.
He wanted to be able to have full rights to care for her in the final days, which he did, until she passed two weeks ago.
Which brings us to:
I’m not a real fan of the concept of marriage. I’m one of those people who thinks it’s just a piece of paper.
But, in the end, does that piece of paper really mean something?
What are your thoughts on marriage vs a partnership?
Do you swing towards one side or the other?
Do you think it’s the same?
Do you think one way clearly is better than the other?