Last weekend New York City Mayor and former Democratic Presidential nominee stated that New Yorkers should feel free to report their neighbors who are not social distancing.

“All you do is take the photo and put the location with it, and bang, send a photo like this, and we will make sure that enforcement comes right away.”

I am grateful that my Amazon Alexa device is no longer the greatest danger to my personal freedoms….

On a serious note, a few weeks ago I gave grief to people who wouldn’t wear masks. This was wrong of me to do. (mark this down in your calendars for something else that happened in 2020- we admitting that I was wrong)

No one has the right to tell anyone what to do. No one has the right to shame someone else for doing what is right to them.

I am sorry.

But the top part of my post? Sorry…not sorry…

89 thoughts on “Quattorodici- Gratitude”

      4. Well, you also have things like, my neighbor doesn’t like me….does she turn me in because I ran out the dog at 6am and I forgot to put on a mask?

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  2. How much power do our governors have? What qualifies them to make decisions that will interfere with the fundament right to freedom? Furious with our governor, she is on the opposite end of the spectrum and instead of making or enforcing rules She continues to say that she just knows Iowans will make the right choice. It’s not happening. So where is the line between we are watching you and we will suggest and hope you do it?

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      1. I totally agree!!!! I can’t imagine how hard this is for all of you in areas hit hard, then adding the threat of being watched is just unimaginable. Another good reason to wear a mask, incognito if neighbors take pics 😷We have it better than most here, number of corona, restrictions, and even space, etc….which instead of complaining I need to have more gratitude for. I just feel our governor is using us as pawns in her game of proving Iowa doesn’t have to shut down. Our numbers are going up, We are expected to peek in 2 to 3 weeks and she is starting to lift restrictions this coming Monday. Kind of doing the opposite of everywhere else (well there’s Georgia!). You said it best, there is no easy answer. I can only take care of me and I will continue to wear my mask, stay to myself and get groceries for my big day out!!!! Stay safe!!!

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  4. Humm, not really sure. We may not have the right individually to restrict others’ rights, but is exposing oneself to danger or exposing others really a right? Constitutionally speaking, only the government or government actors are prohibited from infringing upon a “right.” We require people riding motorcycles to wear helmets, or at least we used to in my state. We have all kinds of safety statutes regulating various aspects of human behavior – why, because people aren’t always very socially or community minded. they pose a risk to themselves and others and society picks up the tab. If the unmasked jackass thinks it’s his right to infect me and kill me with a virus that I’m susceptible to, then maybe I should shoot him in self defense when he crosses the six foot distance line ???

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    1. Or, is it the person at risk should stay at home? And helmets and seat belt laws…when it comes down to it, isn’t that insurance companies and liability that drove those things? Was it protecting us, or keeping costs down.
      I wear a mask, and I’m willing to wear one outside forever, if need be. But in a city where we let out criminals who have committed more crimes while they are now released….what’s better? I don’t like people smoking pot on the street, yet….I have no recourse….I don’t know what the answer is…all I know is, the day the mayor of nyc says rat out your neighbor….I’m done

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      1. Rat out your neighbor is a bit extreme. Persons in the executive branch have no choice but to enforce the law, so if there is an ordinance prohibiting something they must enforce. And they can do that without a tip line. But it is any different than calling in a burglary? In this case, with this virus, we are all at risk. Young and old alike. While some older populations have higher fatality rates, more is being learned about lung damage, neurological damage, strokes and deaths – even in the young. As far as costs in accidents, insurance companies do keep data, do track costs for determining premiums, but we all pay into risk pools and pay for each others’ health care. And we all pick up the remainder in terms of government paid health care costs. Regulating others’ unnecessary risky behavior lowers costs for all of us. There are a million comparisons in terms of what is more deadly, should criminals be released or should prisons be breeding grounds for the virus? Will crime go up if they are released? Do more die in car accidents annually? But arguably none of those is killing at the rate the virus is and what it has the potential to do. I won’t rat anyone out, but I will protect myself, and I do have to get out to buy essential food and medicine that I can’t have delivered. Since many states have stand your ground laws now, self defense is a viable legal defense in this situation.

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      2. I have problems with ratting out people. My neighbor doesn’t like me. Does she turn me in because I ran the dog out at 6am and I didn’t grab my mask?

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  5. And who would these “enforcement” folks even be? Cops? Deputized neighborhood watch captains? Furloughed cafeteria monitors/teachers/librarians? (Librarians would be so good at this—MOVE OVER THERE JOHNNY AND SHHHH!!!) Would they write tickets? cuff ’em? Shame ’em?

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      1. Short-sighted.. I mean we’ll be living with each other long after the virus is gone..so we may want to keep that in mind before calling the “enforcers.” 🙄

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  7. We’ve had the “snitch line” for a month here in my city and apparently 600 complaints have been filed so far…..mostly for parties and too large gatherings. Only one fine was handed out though ($750) after the man was given an initial warning, and that was for not quarantining for two weeks upon return from international travel (which is mandatory now), apparently he felt the need to keep visiting the stores, so the neighbours ratted him out. So, in some cases it might be warranted…..but overall not. It does seem Orwellian. I think it’s the city law enforcement officer but it could be the police, in charge of the investigating, but I suspect they only investigate the more serious complaints, as who would have the time.

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  11. Dear LA, I cannot accept such a blanket statement and I don’t think you meant it the way you phrased it.
    No one has the right to tell anyone what to do. No one has the right to shame someone else for doing what is right to them.
    There are dozens, literally dozens of reasons you could come up with easily where a person has the right to stop someone else from doing something.
    We just had someone in Nova Scotia go on a gun rampage – I am sure you would agree his right to do what he wanted to was wrong.
    What about pollution, breaking into your home, assaulting children, child pornography.
    Really what is the point of society if not to benefit the majority. Otherwise we would turn into Lord of The Flies.
    Laws, taxes, and responsibilities are essential, just as much as rights.
    Where do you call the line? Social distancing failure can cost lives – what if your daughter was on immune suppressant drugs for a heart transplant? How would you tolerate other people’s rights to flaunt social distancing at the risk of her life?

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    1. The minute we cross the line into spying on our neighbors, I can not stand on the sidelines. That strays into we were only following orders. It’s the spying I can’t tolerate. Will I call in a crime? Yes. Will I stamp out hate and prejudice when I see it? Yes. Will I turn in my neighbor because they’re not wearing a mask? No. It starts to beer into getting back at someone you don’t like. The example I gave someone else was, my neighbor does not like me and she calls the management agent for things like me putting up a Christmas wreath and my daughter for talking too loudly with a neighbor in the hallway, and me burning candles in my apartment. Is she going to now report me because at 6am I walked my dog and I didn’t put on a mask? This is a very very fine line to cross

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      1. Grey has so many shades. I am so grateful for my neighbours and hearing about yours reminds me what a difference a good neighbour makes.
        Active spying by your neighbour sucks I agree, I was confident that it was the broadness of the statement that I disagreed with and not you. My point is wreaths and health issues are very different regarding individual freedoms.

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  12. It sounds like a page from dictatorship handbooks. In communist Soviet Union, children attended state childcare so their parents could work for the good of the people. While there, they were taught to turn in their parents for any behaviors or language that went against the state. Many of the things happening now for “our benefit and safety” are the slippery slope to weaken our constitutional rights. This comes from a law abiding citizen who is following stay at home orders, etc., but I can not imagine turning in someone for not social distancing. Next will be shaming those who decide not to get a Covid vaccine next year as they currently shame (or worse) parents who don’t want their tiny babies to be assaulted with many vaccines simultaneously within weeks of birth to benefit drug companies.

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    1. It’s a tad scary. Of course, only about half the people are paying attention to any of the rules. Because people have just had it with this. But that’s a whole other blog

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    1. Apparently, the tip line is filled with obscenities. The thing is…it’s been two months now. People are apathetic about it. I walked the dog before…the weather was nice….about half if the people were wearing masks, and social distancing was intermittent. People may say one thing on their Facebook page, but the reality is far different

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  17. Unfortunately, many people feel very put-upon and confined by the situation, and I think they feel that if they’re complying and following protocol, others should too. I think it’s human nature to expect that if you make sacrifices, others will too. A lot of people are doing really stupid and selfish things right now, so our only alternative is to turn them in. I haven’t, but I understand the impulse.

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    1. I’ve lost the impulse to tell anyone anything. I’ll continue to wear my mask, and socially distance, but I actually read two really good things on Facebook the other day (will wonders never cease) even though we like to mimic high school musical, we’re not all in this together. Everyone’s reality about this is very different. You can’t get down on someone when you have no idea what lives in their head. As Americans were conditioned to expecting happy endings, that dr. Strange will turn back time and save the day. There is no happy ending to this. People will have died, and others will continue to die. That’s reality and it sucks. But the toll of keeping healthy people in a state of inertia will lead us to a body count way higher than .5 percent….if these are my last days on earth, I’m not going down by turning in a neighbor who’s eating a burger on a park bench

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      1. I just think a lot of people are feeling strained trying to do the right thing, and are frustrated when people don’t. That’s human nature, and I understand the impulse to be annoyed. Nerves are frayed, and we’re all doing our best to comply. It’s aggravating when people don’t.

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      4. Here’s my theory. In the beginning there was surreal novelty about this….were living through history. As time has gone one, there’s nothing cute or anecdotal about the reality of our situation. No one is publishing fun lists of things to do anymore…they’re faced with living within four walls with limited access to supplies. Yet….as much as we like to say we’re all in this together, we’re not. My reality is different than yours, and it’s different than x and y. When everything has been taken away, you’re going to rebel….that’s human nature. We’re now all teenagers thwarting authority when we can

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      5. I think most people are still trying to do the right thing. Unfortunately, there will always be people who think rules don’t apply to them. I know of people who’ve actually said they’re enjoying this. You’d have to be insane to feel that way. Still, you are right: things are much different in NYC and I don’t envy your situation at all.

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      6. And what about your daughter. Is she going to college in the fall? My daughter has registered for classes but no word on housing lottery which was supposed to be six weeks ago. The gu parents Facebook page was a mass of nuttiness yesterday and parents realize some if their kids are not going to have stellar grades….

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      7. I hope so. She’s really looking forward to it, and distance learning isn’t really her thing. Her high school is doing a lousy job teaching the kids. I have to limit my exposure to other parents because they drive me crazy.

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      8. My daughter is doing well, but it helps that she had high grades going into virtual learning. She also benefits from a school with small class size and no labs, so her schedule was conducive. But many of her friends from college and high school are not caring so well. To see the parents complain about the revised grade policy is almost laughable. I really think if they don’t go to school in august/September the already bad situation will deteriorate quickly. On another note I just read a post from some woman saying that there is so much to be learned and gained from this experience….my iPad almost flew across the room….I realize it’s hard not to preach, but come on….people have to realize that everyone is in a different boat….

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  18. To me, the scariest thing about this pandemic is how we’re reacting to it. The reality is, we have a virus here that does kill some people and it’s very infectious. And we can stay in total lock down for months, destroying our economy and making millions destitute in the process, and you know what? When we finally are set free, the virus will still be there. And some people will still die from it. The original purpose of the shut downs was to “flatten the curve” (not overwhelm the hospitals with everyone getting it at once) not to guarantee people won’t get this.
    But the fear of it is making people hand over their freedoms, their common sense,and their compassion for others. The fact that the mayor is urging people to rat out their neighbors is a horrible abuse of power, and what kind of man uses a deadly virus to increase his power over others?

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    1. You said exactly what I’ve been thinking. Americans want a happy ending. News flash is there is no happy ending. And that’s just it…flattening the curve does not mean people won’t die…it just means we learn to handle the situation. I know it sounds crass, but people will die. There is no way to prevent this. What I do know is that if these are to be my last days on earth, I’m not making one of my final acts to be ratting out my neighbor who ate a cheeseburger in the park.

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      1. The ratting on our neighbors is totally unAmerican, and I’m not a huge patriot. But visions of Nazis rounding up Jews in the 1930s literally came to mind when I heard and saw these reports. This seems not the America I grew up in.

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      2. I know! Add to this Deblasio saying “you Jews” when responding to a not socially distanced funeral last week….which I knew what he meant, but still….

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    2. I saw a vein diagram the other day, where the three things were 1) worried about the economy, 2) worried about elected officials taking over control and 3) people dying. And the gist was, it’s ok to be all three of these things. Just because you’re feeling one of these things doesn’t preclude you from feeling the others

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      1. Exactly! It’s okay to be concerned with all three, and I think that’s also the sensible way to look at it. I think people are afraid to question the lock-downs because they are immediately accused of being willing to sacrifice someone’s life. But people are dying even weeks and months into the lock downs, so….. I just don’t know how long this virus will stick around and how many people will get it. No one does. But I do know that if we give up our freedoms, we won’t be getting them back anytime soon, if ever. We need to learn to live with this virus and minimize the damage.

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      2. Exactly. We can’t put blinders on and look at this from only one perspective. You need to do a 360 and think about all the ramifications. It’s not ending soon….it’s likely to last for the foreseeable future, and it will change how our lives go on. There’s more statistics than just the body count

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    3. Agree. What I’ve learned and discerned over the past few months, is that people who have power are taking advantage of it and abusing it while people are in a state of first confusion, then shock, then fear. And nobody can think clearly in panic or fear mode, which has helped those in power. And it’s not an either/or. People are dying from this virus as well as loss of jobs, homes, food (which will only increase under these circumstances). Yes, there’s a medical crisis, especially in large cities, like NYC, but to expect every person in the country to lockdown who don’t have immunity issues or are vulnerable to the virus, is wrong and cruel, imo. And yes, when people who have been hiding from the virus come back out, they’ll be exposed again because the virus is still there. There has to be some building up of immunity for people who are vulnerable because there’s no way in hell we will and should be in this state of lockdown, etc. and fear for a couple of years. It’s insanity and not healthy for us psychologically, spiritually, or physically, as well as economically (yes, having money, unfortunately, is a must in our governmental system and culture. We don’t have money to feed ourselves or get life-saving medical treatment for serious illness other than COVID, we die). I’ve not shared my thoughts on this for the most part, but I felt I could here. Civil discourse is greatly needed.

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      1. This does not mean I don’t go around wearing a mask in enclosed places or do social distancing. Washing hands, social distancing, and wearing masks where needed isn’t taking away freedoms, imo.

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  20. Reporting on your neighbours for breaking/stretching the exercise rules? No. If said neighbour was *intentionally* spitting/coughing/sneezing into the uncovered face of another person – then yes, I would. But as that’s such an extreme act, I think most people would do so too, for it’s not much different to witnessing a beating or other physical attack. As in all things, there are lines …

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    1. A beating is a different level. Of course I would call that in….but for someone eating a burger on a park bench on a sunny day amidst all this stuff? I can’t do it

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  21. I read many of the comments and agree there is a slippery slope between “constitutional rights” and “for the good of everyone.” One is very subjective and should not be implemented without a lot of careful thought. You’re correct in there’s little common sense among the average person in the world. That’s evident by the number of calls from people asking about ingesting Lysol and Clorox. Seriously? Was social distancing and quarantine necessary. Probably, but the virus is going to be with us for a very long time. Are we prepared to destroy the economy and quarantine every year when it becomes prevalent again? When a vaccine is developed, will it be mandatory or will people have a choice whether to get it or not? Like it or not, America is a land of personal freedom. Governments can try and restrict people’s behavior, but eventually, unless martial law is declared, they will continue to do what they want. As always, thank you for posing very thought-provoking topics! xoxox

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    1. Thank you for your insightful comments. There is no right or wrong answer. No matter what we do, there will be issues, no one is going to be happy. We have to start thinking of what is good for the majority. It’s like if you have two kids, but one kid has special needs or something. You put all your energy into the kid with issues, and you forget that your “normal” kid needs to be nurtured as well

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      1. You’re correct in that no matter what we do, there will be those who are not happy. No matter what the governments decide is best for the people, there are those who will criticize and spew vitriol all over social media. It’s been disgusting but is now getting unbearable. I rarely listen to mainstream news media anymore. I sympathize with all the people who have to weigh the repercussions of deciding whether to go to work (if they can) and take care of their family or stay home and lose their job/benefits; go out to get what’s needed to survive, or stay home and do without. There is no manual for this. Let’s all be kind and extend grace, understanding no two situations are the same.

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      2. I rarely watch the news. It’s like people have blinders in, as if there’s only one way to think or behave, and if you don’t, you’re wrong. What happened to tolerance and respecting the feelings and beliefs of others?

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