I have begun to find that no one thinks that they are judgmental. Seriously- ask someone if they are, and they’ll say “No Way. I’m totally open minded.”
But think about yourself for a moment:
Have you ever used a phrase like:
Anybody who ____________________________ is stupid/illogical/wrong/etc.
And I want you to ask yourself: Is making a statement like this making a value judgement on someone/something you don’t know? Are you taking one trait of a person and assuming all of this person is totally bad/stupid/illogical/wrong?
Now, you know where I have a blank space? Insert the words watches Fox or watches CNN in there.
Do you know anyone who has ever done that? Have you ever done that? Said that all people who watch a particular news show are stupid? Would you consider that a judgmental statement?
This is not about politics (and yes I remember the Moynihan quote….) This is about how we treat one another on a daily basis. This is how we treat people with differing opinions. This is about our propensity to make blanket statements about people with certain characteristics and traits and likes and dislikes.
How often do you judge someone completely by one thing they do or don’t do?
Very true. Sometimes there can be a leader, a boss, a partner, or a friend who we don’t totally agree with but they make some excellent decisions, do some great things, and yet some of their taste or choices seem strange and we judge. I guess overall we should take a look at the whole picture and see what is happening.
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Exactly my point. Look at the whole then decide
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Guilty as charged. 🙂
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I think we all do it. We just don’t realize we do. And we all have to realize it
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You should hear my judgy-ness in the car… lol
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Well….yeah…😉
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You mean like, “Anybody who puts ketchup on a hotdog is stupid/illogical/wrong/etc, and most certainly un-American. Then sure, I’ll cop to it and go all mea culpa …MEA MAXIMA CULPA. Outside of that “singular” trespass, between you, me , and Isaiah Berlin, I’m value judgement free.
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First off why would you put ketchup on a hot dog?😉 I think we all do it…we just have to acknowledge it and work forward
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I’ve been trying really hard not.to judge others. I havent walked in their shoes so I really dont know. It’s hard but I’m trying.
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I know…it is hard!!
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So true.
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It is human nature to judge others, not right but I don’t know anyone who doesn’t to some degree. I try to forget about the ways we differ and concentrate on ways we are alike. This does not work with everyone and I suppose it is dependent on my mood and if I like the person to begin with.
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Judging is part of out survival instinct. We judge to ascertain who might hurt us. I get that part, but yeah…we have to think about what characteristics we’re judging on
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Suffering from a mental health issue, I have been judged mis-interpreted most of my life, so I do try very hard not to do this to others.
I’m not perfect though, I think people that judge too harshly are cruel and just don’t get it. LOL
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😉 I get that people judge…it’s just being careful what we judge on….
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I’m not much for judging people, myself included. I do however refuse to be disrespected and I’ll stand up for myself, which may be interpreted as judging other people. But it isn’t from point of view. It’s being safe.
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I consider standing up for yourself very different than judging. I’d say if you found the need to stand up for yourself, someone was judging you harshly
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I like your reasoning. Works for me.
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😀😀
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I think if we are all honest, to some degree- at some point in our lives- we have all made some judgemental statements. We might always mean to do it, but even careless moments happen. The important thing is to stop and think about how it would feel if that particular statement were used against us…and so, learn to be better aware of things that we say. This post was just the reminder I needed…while I don’t consider myself to be a judgemental person- I realize that I do, sadly, use blanket statements such as you were talking about. It’s time to do a little ‘clean-up’ in my own mindset…
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That was what I was getting at….we use blanket statements based on one trait and we exploit it without finding out anything else. We’re always going to judge, we just need to be careful what we judge about
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I keep most of my judgments to myself. One area I silently judge is the character of new employees in y workplace. I do some employee health related things in my that must be completed upon hire or shortly after. The people that I have the most difficulty with usually end up not working out as employees in the long term. I also judge the managers who treat the employees like little children instead of grown adults who really want a job.
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That’s a hard call to consider it judging or basing something on past behaviors or actions
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If you are good at judging from first impressions, that doesn’t make you judgmental, just intuitive.
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Well yeah…the whole intuitive thing is a different ball game
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I am totally judgmental. I would be Miranda on “Sex and the City”. Though as I get older I do try and be kinder.
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I think we’re made to be a little judgmental in order to survive. We just need to be careful about it
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I second the person who said…in the car. I’m more judgmental than that, though. But I keep it to myself and try to figure out what my problem is.
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I think we’re all judgmental to a certain degree. We just need to watch what we’re judging on
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Very true. I do judge folks on their news watching habits. I’ve tried to stop, but they continue to confirm my judgements. 😉
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😉
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Haha! At first I thought to my self, I don’t ever judge people. But, clearly, if I plug in the words Fox News I would certainly say that if they watched it for news rather than entertainment, they were certainly either naive, uninformed, or off their rocker. So I guess I am indeed judgmental.
However, I never generalize. But, I’m sure I used to. My sister and I talked about this the other day. She only had girls and I had boys and now that she has a grandson she laughed and said she takes back anything she ever said about mother’s of sons. “I had no idea! They are all over the place. Don’t they ever sit still? “ And I always brought extra food over when she made dinner because she never made enough for my sons. Now she says, “Having two son in law’s I didn’t realize how much young men eat. “ I just laughed. I never really judge moms about their children because being an elementary school teacher I saw so many differences in children. But I know in my youth I judged others on shallow things like their choice of hairstyles or clothing. My BFF for over 45 years ( who recently passed away from cancer) was a conservative Christian Republican and Im a liberal Jewish Democrat. We never judged one another because our teaching and mothering styles were similar and we didn’t bother worrying about our other differences. We accepted one another for who we were. So at this stage in life, I TRY, not to Judge people . But, sometimes it’s very hard not to judge others in this political climate. Great post!
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Thank you! We all judge. It’s part of survival mode. But…we just need to watch what we’re judging on….its just a stop and think sort of thing.
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Whew…….I’m relieved. I don’t get CNN or Fox……I live in Canada and only get basic cable!
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😉
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Oh, I KNOW I judge. 😀 I’d like to think I do so to help process new people I meet, especially to be certain I don’t offend them.
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There is a certain amount of survival instinct when we judge. We just have to be careful about it.
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