“All other types need not apply.”
That’s what a lot of you are afraid of, isn’t it? That once you know a little bit about personality traits you will start basing all your decisions on it? That you will snap judge that if someone is X type you can’t be friends with them, or they won’t be friends with you?
Are you afraid of judging based on one criteria alone?
I get that. I really do.
But I want you to think about this: do you meet everyone with an equal open mind? All the time?
As bloggers, we often find ourselves having people follow us. Have you ever said “Why would a person of A age, who lives in B, and enjoys C like my blog?”
Now, I know that there are people who will just follow anyone in hopes of being followed back, so we’re always wary. But isn’t being wary judging?
Have you gone on a date with every person that asked you?
Have you talked to every single person who has ever started a conversation with you?
Have you ever seen someone and made a judgement about them? Seriously- have you ever decided you did or didn’t like someone based solely on looks or what they wore?
If you have ever done any of these things, haven’t you pretty much based a decision on one thing only?
We were in Utah on vacation once, and we went to a show. The MC asked where people were from, and we were the only New Yorkers, and from the city no less. Let’s just say, we were not the most popular people at that rodeo. We were judged solely on the geographic location where we chose to live.
I don’t know. I’d rather not be liked cause I’m an ISTJ-A. At least you can quantify a personality trait that you don’t like, then just a look or a feeling.
And what about the whole introvert thing. Even without taking a Myers Briggs, most people can peg an introvert. And I’m betting most introverts have heard the following at school. “You really need to participate more.” Because apparently extroverts are smarter… I recently had a conversation with a friend. He told me it “wasn’t good” that my daughter was an introvert, because apparently she’ll never succeed in life. Hmmm. I don’t need to know what combo of letters he is to know that I don’t want to talk to him.
So here’s the thing. I don’t think you should introduce yourself saying your letters. That’s just silly. But don’t be surprised if people see these qualities in you anyway. Don’t you think that there are people that don’t like me because I come across as a know it all? Because I express my opinions unequivocally? Because I take a stand and defend it? They are never going to give me a chance because they don’t like that one trait….
Basically I avoid all people all the time… lol 🙄
No, really, it’s a complicated situation to analyze. And it often depends. Also, you can make assumptions based on a virtual relationship that you will get along in real life, but is that really so? Will the chemistry still exist in life that exists online based on personality traits, or certain characteristics?
How do you know that knowing your ‘results’ are going to guarantee that a relationship with another person will be a successful one simply because you have a deeper understanding of who you are? I mean, typically, I don’t think ahead and say ‘so I’m an introverted neurotic, better not approach people who seem very popular and perky, I would never get along with them’. Turns out I have had a few friends (they live too far away now) that were the opposite of me and we were still really close.
So basically what I’m saying is, I DON’T KNOW anything.
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Hey. I’m with you. I know nothing. That’s why I’m always seeking out answers. Tomorrow I’m going to talk’ about my real life friends and their profiles. Half of my friends are extroverts, because I do think you need a balance. But I also am starting to realize why some of my closest friend do things that drive me crazy!
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Can I email you about an unrelated matter later or tomorrow? I have your email.
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Of course! I’m still recovering from common cold 2019 so I’m laying low. I should be around today and tomorrow
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So explicitly true today, LA! I’ve gotten a lot of grief growing up for being bossy and a know it all. I have the tendency to correct people because I like to be corrected when I’m wrong, but when I make a mistake everyone hangs it over my head because “I’m never wrong.” Everyone makes mistakes. But you’re right on the front that we judge people a lot of the times without knowing them. Or are quick to judge based on small tidbits we know.
Ps introverts will rule the world, you just won’t hear about it because we don’t want anyone to know! 😂😂
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Introverts totally rule the world! I always had a date rule…I would go out with a guy at least twice before I made a judgement because it’s hard to tpreally ge5 to know someone in a short period of time. I don’t like being judged, so 8 tr6 not to do it with others
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For years I used my Myers Briggs letters as part of my blog bio but came to the same conclusion that you did. The thing about Myers Briggs is that it was originally intended to be used to facilitate communication/cooperation within the workplace. Nowhere else. But it got picked up by pop culture and away it went. I think of it as one way of understanding people, not the only way.
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Exactly. It doesn’t tell you completely about a person, but gives you a snapshot. And knowing certain things can facilitate communication because it allows you a window into how they think. But it’s one piece of the puzzle
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The thing is, if you like someone’s style of writing, their thoughts and ideas and vocabulary, you follow them. They make you smile, they make you feel good. There is no need to get buddy buddy with them. For all you know they may be a serial killer. But a serial killer who enjoys your pros. Now that I’ve put suspicion in your mind, I’ll never convince you I am a granny with 3 grandkids and a fantasy writer…ha…
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This totally made me laugh and now I want to be your bff!!😉
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I laughed when you wrote about being the only New Yorkers in the room. When I moved down South, I realized how New York and the South are different continents and never the twain should meet. I have lived here long enough to fit in but I could tell you some funny stories about the South. Now some may realize the war has ended.
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Yeah…we’re aliens…..😉
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Right! Even to my husband from Delaware, he had some funny ideas about New Yorkers. I think I set him straight!
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😀😉
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You are so right…people judge on all aspects of life. It took getting older to realize just how much judging there is and I was guilty too when I was younger. I think you hit a certain age and you begin to realize how ridiculous it is! Great post!
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Thank you! It’s one of the best things about getting older!
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I don’t think anyone should be taking tests on the internet. These tests were designed and should be given and explained by a professional. I don’t care what you are or what you do or don’t do, if I like what you say, I’ll listen.
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First I’m starting out with a true story. My daughter taught herself to read at a fairly early age. My husband was excited, asa dad, and told a relative of his this. The relative has a PhD in child psych and is a specialist on administering tests to determine if a child is gifted, or has learning disabilities. This relative, without testing anything, promptly replied….well, you know she’s not gifted…..so, I take anything with regards to tests, or who administers them, with a grain of salt. But, these quizzes…as long as you’re not basing life decisions on them, I think they’re harmless. And honestly, for me, this test told me absolutely nothing that I didn’t know about myself. But yeah….some things should be done by pros
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I think humans have a genetic trait to make snap judgments, because it served us well on the savannah. Now it’s counter to a civil society. We can overcome it through awareness, just like you do here with your blog.
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You are right of course…we need to protect ourselves so we make judgements. But…we have to be aware of judging too quickly or too harshly
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Still working on it!
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😀
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Me, being the odd one that I am , I am a Texan who is always befriending New Yorkers ! I like you because you are so outspoken and you seem so sure of yourself. I’m attracted to strong people like you. I always get myself in trouble and feel guilty when I get too sure of myself, hahaha! Anyway, I will try to take the test again since I can’t remember what I am. It’s a weird one. Maybe this one. http://www.personalitypage.com/html/INTJ.html I do overthink things and despite my reluctance I often end up leading the discussion in a group situation. Not everyone likes me because I can come off as a know it all , but I really do like to discuss and hear other people’s side.
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I like people who speak their mind and say what they mean. That’s why we read each other!!
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Well I just realized , after reading this, that my husband is an ISTJ. There ya go. http://www.personalitypage.com/html/ISTJ.html Of course I know the other side of him. “Under stress, ISTJs may fall into “catastrophe mode”, where they see nothing but all of the possibilities of what could go wrong. They will berate themselves for things which they should have done differently, or duties which they failed to perform. They will lose their ability to see things calmly and reasonably, and will depress themselves with their visions of doom.” Yep.
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Hey….we do our best….you are strong and know it. That’s all that matters
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Okay, now I’m getting confused again. This one sounds more like me. http://www.personalitypage.com/html/INFP.html I think I better go find something else to do, lol. See what you started!
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My friend sent me a good description thing. If I still have it I’ll send a link!
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Everyone has different Hope’s, dreams and struggles. What I enjoy the most from reading others blogs ,is that it gives me a window into the lives of others. Living a life much differently from my own . Taxi cab driver from new Delhi, artist from Australia, Stay at home mother from England with aspirations of becoming a published author.
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I’m like you. I try to find people from different places and situations. What I learn most is that we’re oddly alike
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Good conclusions. 🙂 That’s one reason I’ve loved the blogging community: getting to know everyone (and they, me) without any of those preconceived observations or classifications.
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Exactly!
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Guilty of all of the judging criteria 🙂
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I think we all are to a certain degree…
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🙂
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