So I began meditating.  So I began reading about meditating.  Lots of people do it.  In fact I read an article stating that many influential people start off their day with some sort of meditation. If people who get things done, who are successful in their chosen areas, do it, shouldn’t I give it a chance?

Excuse #1: I can’t sit in that position.  I have weird hip joints.  Who sits on the floor anyway?.

Excuse#2: I am not good at sitting still. I’m a two speed person: on and asleep. Do you really think I can sit anywhere for more than a minute without losing my mind?

Excuse#3: I can’t clear my mind! You know me- I’m always thinking.  What? You think I can just shut off a brain like this?

Excuse#4: Breathe? I already do that.  Why do I have to concentrate on breathing?

Excuse#5: Mantra. You want me to repeat the same word over and over again? First off- what word do I choose? What if I choose the wrong word? Can I change my word? Secondly- you want me to keep saying the same word over and over? Really?

Excuse#6: Close my eyes.  OK- if I am going to close my eyes for an extended period of time, why don’t I just take a nap?

Excuse#7: Where’s my yoga mat?

Excuse#8: If my eyes are closed and I’m not thinking, how do I know when my time is up? Do I set a timer? Are there special meditation timers? Or do I just make the ringtone a bell?

Excuse#9: I don’t own any meditation clothes.  If I buy an outfit it will up my clothing total which I just worked hard to get to a manageable number. Does it fall into athletic clothing? Technically I’m on the floor with a mat, there’s timing involved and I’m breathing….

Excuse#10: I’m just not a spiritual person.  I’m practical.

Now you see, I obviously can’t meditate….

Obviously- if anyone in the world needs to learn how to meditate it would be me…I really do need to relax my mind and quiet my thoughts, but it’s actually a little scary, the thought of getting a sense of peace and serenity. It’s so unlike me.

For now, I’m going to continue reading about it.  Perhaps I can reach a Zen state by association- I think about meditating so I vicariously meditate…

Ok- maybe not so much…

But….

I’m going to work on this.

59 thoughts on “Mediwhat?”

  1. Many years ago I turned to meditation when my health was going south. I was overweight, had acid reflux and my lower back was a barking mess every night and morning.

    I got back to running, for good. Changed up my diet and got off the purple pill. And I took up meditation. I had the same misgivings as you. It was like, this ain’t for me! Thankfully, I had a Jedi master in the form of a ’60’s style hippie I was pals with. He told me to just stick with it and the truth would happen.

    Early on, the results were less than encouraging. I couldn’t sit still, I couldn’t focus, I couldn’t clear my mind and the back pain persisted. The change came subtly and over time. Making it a daily habit was the key. And what I came to understand was that meditation wasn’t going to deliver me to a cloud on the mountaintops of Tibet. And that’s okay. Because the destination I reached was equally beautiful. It was imperfect and always a work in progress. But it worked. For me.

    The postscript was that my back pain subsided before going away entirely. I WAS clearing my mind, even if there were mornings when it sure as heck didn’t feel that way. And that clarity, man, it worked wonders.

    Sorry for the ramble, but I hope you give it a shot.

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    1. Rambling welcome here!! Thank you! I need stories like yours because I know I’m not alone that it’s hard in the beginning, and not as easy to judge your progress

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  2. You can actually meditate with your eyes open! Just pick a point to focus on. Also, clearing your mind isn’t the goal. The goal (over time with consistent practice) is to make the mind serviceable.
    You can use a phrase instead of a word. You can try walking meditation if sitting annoys you. The point is to observe and detach. Notice who (or what) is thinking the thoughts and let each gracefully float away.
    Oh, and no spirituality is required. OM
    ❤️🦋🌀

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  3. Like you, I have had trouble quieting my mind; however, I agree with the ladies above, meditation is about “anything” that starts to make us feel calm and relaxed…. so that could be sitting in meditation mode or that could be walking and listening to a good podcast. The idea is to release our mind of worries, so we can focus on health, happiness and creativity. It takes practice, but at some point we reach a peacefulness. Writing in a journal first thing in the morning, I think that is like meditation.

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  5. Appreciated this post. I cannot meditate. Even in yoga class when the teacher intones, “Empty your mind of all thoughts,” my mind is scrabbling frantically like a rat terrier: thecreditcardbillwillbehighthismonthineedtosendabirthdaycardtosherrywedon’thaveenoughmilkforbreakfastistillhavefivemorepagestoeditwhereisthesparekeythebatteryisabouttorunoutintheremoteididn’tanswermary’semailaboutthelayout . . . and on and on. I’m sure I’d be less stressed, calmer and more productive if I could train myself to meditate, but I’ve failed at multiple attempts. Admire those who can do it!

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    1. I totally admire those who can! I really want to try, but what you described is me!! I know it will be good for me if I do it, I just have to do it!!

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  6. You don’t need to sit cross-legged. You don’t need special clothes. You don’t need to clear your mind. Sit comfortably on a straight-backed chair (no slouching!), eyes open or closed, focus on the in-breath and out-breath. As for thoughts, the idea is to simply notice them, but let them arise and then go without attaching any importance to them. Your mind will slowly settle – which is not the same as emptying!

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  7. I loved this, it made me chuckle because I’m guilty of this when it pertains to exercise.
    There are all different types of meditation. No special clothes, special sitting pose needed. Try some of the meditation apps. My kids swear by HeadSpace. There is also Calm. I use ThinkUp for affirmations when I’m in an Affirmation phase. It should be what works for you — keep trying!!

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  9. Got a good laugh on Excuse #6, that would be totally me. But, I also have thought about meditating since those who I work with tend to meditate every morning. Anyways, this was a good read. Thank you for sharing. 🙂

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  10. Get the Insight Timer (free app) and just listened to a few, don’t worry about actually meditating at first, just let the guided meditation play and see what happens. And try a bunch of different ones, some are a little too whoo-whoo for me but you can do just sounds and make your own timer with sounds and bells. Enjoy exploring. Baby steps.

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    2. I just discovered a drawback to letting your mind wander on the bus. I have no idea why the police just boarded the bus looking for someone. I wouldn’t even have noticed them if the one hadn’t gotten on the bus from the back. There wasn’t even a struggle or anything. Oh well. Back to meditation. ☺☺

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  13. 😂
    I only meditate on things I want to remember. I don’t do the clearing my mind and chanting thing. However, when I’ve read something that has benefited me, I try to take a few moments to ponder it. That’s the extent to which I get involved with meditation. 🤷🏽‍♀️

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  15. Thank you for the smiles this morning. I actually took a class on mindfulness through my doctor’s office. No charge so didn’t need to worry about insurance stuff. We learned about the whys and hows of meditation and mindfulness. The big thing I learned? That people don’t meditate the same. I like to listen yo great music while on the bus. Mostly because you have to sit in one place and if you have headphones on, weird people don’t try to talk to you. The best advice I got from the teacher? Practice. Set a goal. Sitting still and not focusing on all the thoughts running through your mind is a great goal. Start for 30 seconds to a minute at a time. I was at the minute mark for weeks before I moved up to 3, and then 5. Still can’t for very long. Sometimes you just have to stare at the scenery out the bus window.

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  19. I have taken a meditation class twice with the same instructor but 20 years apart and could meditate in the class while listening to her voice, but could not do it at home. Finally I bought her tape/cd of meditation exercises for home and it relaxed me (there was background music and nature sounds too), but not to the point of what I would call meditating. I have also read a couple of books about it, including that bestseller by a TV newscaster from few years ago? Ten Percent Happier I think it was called. I’ve given up – it must not work for Type A People….they say you have to keep practicing so maybe I gave up too soon? I like quick results.

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  24. Ha, ha! This is really great. I appreciate your humor and style of writing. And, good for you for considering meditation!

    I meditate regularly, and honestly, it has been one of the greatest tools to help me stay sane 🙂 , centered and relaxed. Happy to share some resources with you, if you like. Feel free to email me at weloveyou@forgivingconnects.com.

    Good luck. Blessings!
    Debbie
    ps – I can appreciate it would feel a little scary. Truly – it’s different right?! I started out 5 minutes once per week. (Set myself up for success.)

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  25. Pingback: Mediwhat? – Waking up on the Wrong Side of 50 – Empty Nest Man

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