Spoiler alert: I did not learn to let it go. After a week of self reflection I have more questions than answers. I’m even beginning to question if letting things go is the right approach…
Here’s some random observations, in no particular order:
- The people I have had confrontations with, that I can’t get past, are all people I know via my Husband: a friend, a friend’s spouse, a relative. I can’t help but think that as these are people I would never see if not for my Husband, I can’t get past issues because I do not think positively of these people in general because we do not share the same value system. So the question becomes, how do I avoid confrontation with the people in my life that fall into this category? I recently read something about the Grey method, (which is a sort of ignoring thesis) and I’m going to study up on it and see if I can apply it to these situations.
- I need to set better boundaries with my Husband and Daughter. I can let things slide, but I have to learn to rationally and calmly define my expectations about what really matters to me, and make sure that the communication is clear with them.
- I have very few people in my life that I can be completely open with. Thankful for them, because it’s great to just be able to totally be able to be myself with no holds barred. It’s freeing.
- I am much better at letting things go with the people that mean the most to me. I guess with my close friends their friendship is more important than something trivial. I might be annoyed for a little bit, but I rationally get over it. I know I’ve been annoyed by my closest friends, but I can’t actually think of something that they did wrong, so I obviously can get past things and forget.
- How do I get over things? I concentrate on what the bigger picture is. How much is something going to matter over time? Will there be lasting consequences to the behavior? Will something set a bad precedent. It all comes down to picking which battles are worth fighting.
- When someone is being irrational, walk away. You can’t reason with someone who does not want to listen.
- Try to limit time with people I know are going to try my patience.
- Stick to chit chat with people that I do not consider my inner circle. The aggravation is just not worth my time and energy.
- Avoid people in general.
- Cherish the people really close to me.