As a rule, I don’t remember what I read or write on any particular day. Of course, there are exceptions to any rule.
On 9/11/2017 I shared with you my personal feelings and experiences from 9/11/01. I was living and working in NYC that day, so what I expressed were my memories, no one else’s.
On 9/11/17, I also read some things. Today’s post is about what I read that day:
Tragedy- an event causing great suffering, destruction, and distress, such as a serious accident, crime, or natural catastrophe (dictionary.com)
I read many posts and such comparing 9/11 to other tragedies. People wrote, “Why do we care about 9/11 more than we care about X?” (fill in X with whatever tragedy you want)
Now here’s my question to people who wrote something like that: When did this become a pissing contest? When did we decide to measure one tragedy against another? Can you please send me the rubric so I can determine the pecking order of which destruction of life and property deserves more facetime? Because I sort of treat all tragedies as just that- a horrible event that wreaked havoc on a whole bunch of lives.
The next series of posts and things I read centered around – “OMG it was 16 years ago. Why are you still so bothered by 9/11?” OK- here’s the thing: Please don’t ever tell someone else when their grief or heartbreak should be over. Again, if there is a timeline for how long it takes to get over something tragic, please send it to me. Don’t tell someone they “should” be over loss of a child, or a divorce, or the loss of a home. There is no statute of limitations on grief- you can grieve about something the rest of your life. And to all of you who may say “Get over it”, you know what I call you? A bully. Because that’s what bullies do: they try to intimidate you into thinking you are weak. Guess what? Grieving for something or someone does not make you weak: it makes you human. And a bully- well, we know what you are…
So today, 9/11/18, I ask the following of you:I
- Don’t bully anyone ever.
- If you are going to say anything derogatory, think about it. Think if it will make anyone feel better. If it doesn’t, ask yourself why you are saying it.
- If there is a tragedy that you care about, please donate your money and/or your time to helping the victims of that tragedy
- Truly listen to those around you and accept that there point of view may be different from yours
- Be kind
- Be kind
- Be kind