Here’s a sample of things that I like:

  1. indie, art house movies about esoteric subjects
  2. big, thrilling blockbusters
  3. 19th century British Literature
  4. silly love stories
  5. 10 course tasting menus with wine pairings
  6. cheeseburger, fries and diet coke (no ice)

These are all things that make up who I am.

Here’s some random comments that people have said to me:

  1. How could you go to Graceland? It’s so tacky.
  2. Opera?  Why would you want to see a bunch of people scream in foreign languages?
  3. I don’t understand how you can enjoy music produced after 1980- it’s all junk.
  4. I don’t know how you can call this a good restaurant- a good restaurant serves a pieces of chicken parm the size of your arm
  5. I would never spend time in a museum.  My toddler could do that modern art stuff.
  6. TV?  You watch TV? I don’t even own a TV.
  7. Why should I go to a movie with subtitles?  Who wants to read a movie?
  8. Food served out of a truck?  I would never.

Etc.

Conclusion: I am too high brow for some, too low brow for others.  What this also means is that I am judged, unfairly, by many.

When you hear that someone has a hobby or enjoys something, like it or not, you are going to make an assumption about that person.  You are going to think specific things based on what they like or do not like, do or do not do. No matter how evolved we think we have become we still label, categorize and judge. We still sort people into groups.

So here’s my message for today: Do the things that make you happy.  Don’t judge others by the things that make them happy. Accept that people have habits and interests that you may not like.  Don’t expect that person to change the things that they like, or the things that they do.  A person’s habits, likes and interests are the things that make up that person, make them special and make them unique. Do not assume that because someone likes to see plays that they are overly intellectual and snooty.  Do not assume that a person who likes a musical with catchy lyrics is trite and shallow.  Do not assume that someone who likes to go to live theater is pretentious. Don’t think that a person who doesn’t see live theater is a Neanderthal.  Don’t assign a personality trait based on one small detail of a person. Find out all the little things that go into a personality, and then still don’t judge.  Accept that all people are different and all people are the same.

In short: Don’t Assume

70 thoughts on “Middle Brow”

  1. I’m going to make a blunt and daring assumption here…some of those sound like someone’s mother.
    😁
    Only reason I’m saying this is because I know Italian, Portuguese and Jewish mothers who speak exactly like that. 🙃
    Hey! Remember the scene in Moonstruck where they go to the Opera? I wanna do that….😘😉

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    1. Oddly….not either of my parents, who have eclectic tastes. My in laws though……These things have been said to be by people I’ve met in social situations. It gets annoying.

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  2. Love this post…we are all guilty of judging others sometimes unconsciously but I believe in live and let live. I should be able to be me and you should be able to be you full stop! For the record I love movie with subtitles 🎥…

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      1. We absolutely do! I don’t like it when I do but I am human so… I do make an effort to be more conscious of it and when I find myself doing it I try to move into a more understanding/tolerant space…some attempts more successful than others…

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  4. I really hate the “I don’t have time to read” and the “I don’t own a TV” thing. I get that a lot. Said in a way that means they don’t waste their time on petty things like that. I don’t care what people think about the way I spend my time.

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  5. Yes! Everyone makes judgments. I am much more aware of my own judginess now, and trying to do better, and I’ll take it back mentally. I judge people’s choices of cars, tattoos, diets. I know it’s dumb. I still like them but I do have those thoughts. Then I tell myself not to assume anything! It’s hard being an eclectic person in a non-eclectic world. Go you ! Thanks for a great post.

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  6. Amen!
    Life is too short to like or do things according to what other may think. The only sensible thing is to do what brings you joy!
    Let your freak flag fly!
    Let everyone else fly their freak flag too.
    Remember, “Tain’t nobody’s business if I do.”
    Great post!

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  7. LA – excellent post! One of my favorite things about turning 50 was that freedom that I finally embraced in doing my own thing and not caring who/how I’m judged. I enjoy what I do enjoy and that’s ok with me.

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  8. “Let me tell you a little something about things I don’t like: Boxing. Sporting events of any kind. Barbeques. Office parties. Buddy movies. Any dish made with marshmallows. Things that I do like: The opera. The symphony. Elizabethan revenge dramas, et cetera. So, if you’re not inclined in any of these interests, well, then frankly our association can be civil – at best”

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      3. I started thinking, oh no! Abort! Abort! Lmao. Well…thats why they all leave his house after that cause it’s such an incredibly jerky thing to say 😂 But! This did inspire me to go ahead with a similar one i’ve been wanting to write this year.

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  9. Very well stated, LA!!! 😊 And you know what they say about those who assume… 😂

    I actually like it when I learn new thing about people. Because even if you have someone figured out, for example let’s say your best friend, it’s still fun to learn something new. Why fit everyone inside neat little boxes when we are all unique individuals? Great post today! ~K

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  10. Here here!!
    I dig indie flicks too. And I happen to think the ’80’s were the best decade for music . . ever. And I love opera and fried chicken and I have coupled them up thanks to YouTube. And yes, because you do the things that make a day worth it. And if that’s the middle, Imma be all about it.

    Love this.

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  14. Hmm I’d honestly never thought my tastes could be ‘chavvy and common’ to some people, and visiting museums makes me cultured to others! Having said that I’ve debated at work that some hobbies make you cool i.e. watching football, and unfairly some hobbies make you nerdy such as watching trains, we should never make assumptions…………. and woe betide the person who slags off a big mac and fries.

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  15. I’m totally reaching that age where I’m like “the hell with what other people think, if I like it imma do it”

    Of course, I do still tone it down around mom and in the occasional polite social situations. Because its important to respect others, too.

    Well said😍😍😍

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  16. The older I get the less judgmental I have become.
    I love cheeseburgers, fries and diet coke but with TONS of ice! (Not judging you, though 😀 )
    Love random comment #5 . . .”I would never spend time in a museum. My toddler could do that modern art stuff.” I must admit, however, I have been to a museum and have thought , “my kids could DO THAT!” LOL

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  17. I don’t understand why people feel the need to comment on what other people do with their time. On the other hand, I don’t like when people constantly brag about doing things to try to show how cultural or literate they are. In some cases, I think they’re trying to show off or make others feel inferior. I am not suggesting that you do this. I just have known people who have tried to puff themselves up by bragging about how cultured they are.

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    1. I get the bragging thing…but so many people feel like they need to mock what you do…and these are adults. No wonder kids are afraid to try new things….people can be horrible

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      1. This is true. And I just brought it up to provide another outlook. My mother-in-law used to correct my pronunciation of certain words, and was always wrong, so that’s what I mean about people trying to seem more cultured. Make sense?

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  18. It is the people you meet while doing the things you like who make the difference. I met my husband, my best friend while doing something I loved and following my path. Just like the best of things come to you when you know what you want and it ain’t Oprah, we don’t care because we don’t need her education.

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  20. I’m with you. My interests are wide and diverse, and I wouldn’t change any of them. I pity those who rule out complete categories of entertainment because of some preconceived notion of what’s important or worthy. Having said that, I have never had the opportunity to attend the opera in person. One day, as God is my witness….

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  21. People group themselves as well as others, my son is a self described nerd because he likes Euro board and card games, but he is a musician, ball player etc. It is almost like people will apologize for liking things by whom they are describing them to.

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  22. I continue to be amazed by the verbal chutzpah of others. I fantasize often about ripping them a new one, but that was part of my younger (angrier) self. Better to find a way to shake a head and perhaps laugh at them later. At least that’s the goal anyway. – Marty

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  23. Oh, exactly! Just do what you want to do and pursue what interests you, and don’t worry about other people judging you for it. I hate how judgemental our society has become! Why should we be afraid to enjoy the things that we like?
    And PS: I’ve been to Graceland, too. I’m not an Elvis fan, but I was in Memphis for the weekend, and I was curious about it!

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    1. I loved Graceland! I just thought it was Americana at its finest! And interesting to see how even Elvis felt a little inferior, no matter how much success he achieved! But yeah, why do people judge what you do and don’t like?!

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