I recently read about a study about intelligence in children. The study said that children who are curious are more intelligent than the ones that are not.
Wow.
In a million years I never would have deduced that. Seriously, who knew that “why” was such an important word. (FYI- where can I get paid to study the obvious…)
So, why is why so important? Because why makes you think. Why makes you look at possibilities. Why leads you to the next theory or the next question. Why opens up your mind. And anything that allows your mind to go a step further automatically makes you more intelligent because you are furthering your knowledge and starting to form conclusions and beginning to see patterns. Why opens up the mind. Opening your mind just lets stuff creep in. Guess what happens when you begin to accumulate knowledge? You get smarter.
There’s a parenting theory that you are never supposed to say “no” to a child. And if you’re like me, you know that this is not often practical, or reasonable or logical. Though the interpretation of this school of thought has been a little skewed, the theory behind it is decent. If your child is asking why, or how, you should let them explore, or you should explain to them why they can’t, and give them concrete examples. EG: Your kid wants to stick something in the light socket. You say no. Then, you find an age appropriate discussion about currents, or electricity or anything like that. Make it a teachable moment- tell them why you shouldn’t do that, but give them more than “You’ll get hurt”. They’re not stupid for wanting to stick something in a socket: they see you do it all the time. They’re curious- they think, well, if mom puts this plug in there, the light goes on. What happens if I stick my doll hand in there, will the doll light up? Their brain is searching for the next step. Help them get to the next step. Teach them to think. Remember for a three year old, considering what happens when you stick something in a socket is thinking out of the box. It’s not safe, but it is creative…
So the next time your kid is haunting you with “Why, why, why”, remember that they are just trying to expand their knowledge. They are trying to learn. Teach them. And, remember, learning doesn’t stop just because you leave formal school: learning is forever. Every blog I write starts out with a question in my mind: why is that so, how does that happen, when did it begin, what caused it… My blog is a testament to my thought process- whether or not I’m intelligent doesn’t matter- I keep trying to learn. I am constantly educating myself. Will I ever become intelligent? Who knows. But I’m going to keep asking questions and trying to find answers.
I’m curious that way…
My mom says I drove her crazy with “why” when I was a kid😁🤗😁
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See…in my mind I knew that!!
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hehe, you’re reading my mind. my youngest had me explaining plumming to him this morning. and on the light socket thing, sadly, my daughter learned why not after she stuck the headphone plug inside.
I’ve been told before that i waste my time when i explain adult things to children seeing that ‘how can they understand’ if they’re only kids, but, like you said, if they’re asking, it’s because they’re trying to make sense of it. so why not tell them?
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That’s exactly how I feel. If they’re asking, why not give them an explanation they can grasp? It’s all about breaking something down into relatable chunks. Don’t give them the PhD version, give them the practical. I hate the exchange why….because.
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Haha- I was SO that kid. With dad being a pastor- I was (and still am) notorious for asking theological questions that not even he could answer. That’s one of the reasons I am such a book nerd- he’d give me a book and tell me to read it. Actually- the other day my seven year old said that she couldn’t read a book because it wasn’t in her age range. I was like “At your age I read encyclopedias for fun and was put in a special class where I read teen/classic novels if you want to read the book…. read the book!” I love when they ask me why. We always have discussions.
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That’s how I am!! I can discuss anything! Obviously….I love having real talks about the why and the how of things! That’s so much more fun than keeping up with that annoying family….
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Why can’t the kitchen clean itself? If I sit here and read LA all morning, what will happen to the mess? I’ll never find out if I don’t try…🙃
Blah.
The why’s don’t bother me too much. The timing of them however… Lol.
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Well…timing never right….but let’s get on this automatic kitchen cleaning thing….
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I love everything about this post!
Why questions are paramount for kids, and for adults! What I find fascinating is that when you ask Why? as an adult it is often taken as a criticism. Like, “Will you tell me why do you do it that way?” is asked to understand the thought process behind it, not because the asking individual thinks it’s being done the wrong way.
Why is that? This is a teachable moment! And as much as kids are naturally curious, so are adults.
Why are why questions considered “bad”? Why wouldn’t one want to share their thought process with another?
We may never know, but like you, my curiosity is insatiable. I’ll never stop asking Why? because I want to keep learning as much as I can all the days of my life!
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I know! When did why become such a mad word? I hate when people get mad when you ask, because, like you, I just want to know the thought process, to see if one way is better, or if something makes sense….I’m continually trying to learn and grow. A stagnant brain is an old brain, and that’s the kind of old I don’t want to be!!
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Amen to that! ❤
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I love why’s…except when the littler sister and grandma are sitting in the hot car waiting to pick up bigger sister from school and the “why game” begins. This little one, who knows how silly repeating why, why, why can be because hot grandma means low patience grandma, then has the opportunity to work on reading skills with one of her books 😉
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Well yeah…. theres that…..
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Brilliant! It should have been obvious to us all!
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😀😀
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I so agree with this post! They say curiosity killed the cat, but I live dangerously! 🙂
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That’s the way to take risks…ask questions…look for answers….
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🙂 Yes!
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You are so right some of these funded studies seem so obvious that they beg the question “WHY?”
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😉
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Yes we have to keep asking. If there is one thing I have learned it’s that I don’t know shit 🙂
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Im do with you!!
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This Nonni loves the idea of letting them learn! Some of their adventures in learning do scare me (like my one year old grandson who wondered, “What if I moved this box to the table and climbed right up?”) but I do love seeing them explore the world around us!
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Yeah…I remember those moments where you take a deep breath….
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I was constantly being told not to keep asking why when I was a kid or got the answer ‘because I say so’ that when I had my son I explained everything to him, this sometimes back fired on me. I still remember (I will admit with a smile, dose that make me a bad person), the time my son asked about babies and he went to school and told his class mates all the girls had eggs in them. I just thank the heavens that he didn’t try to explain sperm. 😁
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😀😀😀
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It’s challenging to be around people who never ask why.
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I’m a questioner. Totally agree
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In my five boys I see two types of intelligence , thinkers and experimenters. The thinkers don’t always act on their curiosity, they might do a lot of reading and discussing , but the hands on ones will get busy. It’s interesting! I’m very , very curious, but not as hands on as I’d like. My husband is very artistic and mechanical and can fix anything and create things out of junk. But academically he struggled be dropped out of school. I have a degree from a university. But I’m wowed by the things he can do!
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Totally get that. I’m obviously a thinker, but I hate reading instructions….I love to figure things out, which is usually fun, but sometimes…😀 and yeah…I don’t think people appreciate that there are different types of intelligence
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My kids engage me everyday with the many why’s. While I have an answer to most of their queries, it’s fun to know the why’s that I don’t know..always enriching to empower self first before thinking of empowering them!
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I know! I love when I get to learn something new!
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Presently getting a good dose of North American geography cause of my son!!
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😀😀😀
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I’m fascinated that you begin every blog with a question. That never occurred to me, but it’s a great starting point. No wonder you are never at a loss for subjects. I don’t ask why enough, and I don’t think many adults do either. Maybe this is why I find children so charming.
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I’m the original why girl. At one of my jobs they called me “yeah, but” because I was always questioning something. Trust me…this does not make you miss popularity….
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I’ve noticed I allow for less curiosity in children #3 and #4 because I’m old and tired and don’t want to clean up the mess left after “why.” 🙂
When I can, however, I think this is vital. I take them places to explore, allow them to get dirty, and encourage creative solutions. (…just not inside on the carpet 😉 )
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Agreed!!
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