My daughter recently read “Pride and Prejudice.”  As many of you know, this is my favorite book.  I aspire to be Lizzie Bennett.  Well, a modern day version because I’m rather fond of indoor plumbing.

There’s a little backstory to my daughter reading this novel.  For AP Lang, they were required to read the first three chapters of a book from a time period they had trouble with, which is the 19th century for her.  And she was not loving the book when she began to read it, and couldn’t understand why I loved it so, but she chose to keep reading it.

Proud moment.  My daughter chose to voluntarily read this book. (and it’s a requirement for college English next year so she’s a bit ahead of the game)

And we began discussing the book, my daughters perspective that Lizzie was a boy hungry gossip, and my perspective was that my daughter was nuts.  But for arguments sake I tried to pretend that she might have a point in certain respects.  A very small point, but there’s nothing like a good debate.

Not so proud that she found this book to be the first recorded chick lit novel.

One morning I got a text from her when she was on the M101 on her way to school.

DAUGHTER: OMG Char marries Mr. Collins???

Proud moment.  My daughter texting me about a plot point in the book.

It’s amazing that my daughter reading my favorite novel could bring me so much joy.  It was wonderful to see the novel though her eyes, to discuss certain plot points and reasons why Austen chose to portray certain things in certain ways.  We analyzed the book as scholars, referred to it as a historical point of reference, and bonded as mother and daughter.

Bonding.  That was the best part.  Sitting at the table, or walking down the street, we were able to communicate with one another on a different level than just Mother/Daughter.  As my kid is smarter than me, and often more astute, we were able to discuss this novel as equals. Our relationship had just reached a new level.  I began to really see my daughter as the woman she will soon become.

Pride.

I am proud of the child she was, and I am proud of the woman she is becoming.  There are times, especially during middle school or teething, when a parent feels like they are failing at parenting.  They feel like they are the worst parent in the world, and things will never get better.  And then you hit a moment….and you exhale.  You realize that though not perfect, you did some things right.  You realize that you’ve raised a decent human being who you are now able to have an actual relationship with.

Proud.

When you hit one of these moments, savor it.  Because you know there are still going to be bumps ahead.  But take advantage of this small victory- this moment when you see your kid in a new light.

Allow yourself to spend a moment being proud.  You deserve it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

73 thoughts on “Pride and Not so Prejudice”

  1. I am waiting for this to happen with my son. My daughter is a ferocious reader, and my son was but stopped. What is it with teen boys? Oh wait, Fortnite… 🙄

    I thought long and hard what to introduce to my kid next. He read the trilogy Lord of the Rings, the Hobbit and all the Harry Potter books before he turned double digits, and did a book report on the Hitchhiker’s Guide….so it’s not like he can’t read ‘good’ books. But he stopped. So the other day I picked up Bill Bryson’s The Thunderbolt Kid…will he read it?

    I’ll have to blog about it if he does. 🙂

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    2. Honestly, for me, it’s not that I don’t like reading, I just have very specific genre of books I like and I easily get turned off early on in books.

      It’s definitely something I’m trying to work on because I watch my wife devour all types of books and I’d like to broaden my horizons.

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      1. It’s funny, but I read books depending on the mood I’m in the moment I’m looking. I’m going to need a new book tomorrow, and I know I want something light and easy and a real person type of story. But no mysteries or sci fi

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    3. My son(17y.o.)is the same,same game too.Last year he did read the “Maze Runner”series. Checked them out thru the library’s e-book app. He earned a reading award. If your son read those other books just hang in there. He’ll read again. In the meantime I’m praying thunder will knock out his video system😛

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      2. There are few books lately that would interest boys. My dad read westerns,some read spy novels but the pickings are few for boys. Most have girls/women as lead charecter.

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  2. Parenting is like flying through an asteroid field at light speed. You have no time to reflect on how you just nearly crashed into the last 12 astroids, you just have to keep on flying, and keeping an eye out for the next one.

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  3. Love that you posted this today of all days as it has been that kind of day for me and I can absolutely understand where you are coming from. Now, if I could just get my daughter to read the same things I do. Lol!

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  4. My 14 year old seemed to transform overnight from reading young adult novels to books I read. Our discussions about Dostoevsky, Orwell, Bradbury, Twain, Shelley, and other writers almost make up for all the sulky “whatevers” and the fact that I don’t know which child I’m getting at any given moment. Should make her read Stevenson’s Jekyll and Hyde! Still, it is a lovely thing to be able to share a love of literature.

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    1. It’s true. I’ve been rereading books that my daughter is reading for school so that we can discuss them, and I’m loving it. I appreciate her viewpoint as she views things differently because of time she’s grown up in. Our discussions on Kate Chopin were the best, because we had such opposite positions. We have to appreciate these moments!!

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      1. It was pretty good. A little repetitive about the voting thing, but the discussions and interviews about the books were great. They did a bunch of in depth spots on certain books, and touched on a lot of the others. Fortunately. So they didn’t have to try to come up with some bit on why Fifty Shades or Twilight would somehow be better than P&P or The Lord of the Rings.

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  9. My daughter asked me to buy her my favorite books as a birthday gift. We have the same taste so I thought it was a perfect idea. She is reading my favorite book right now. It is wonderful! I used to do that with my grandma. Years ago my old running partner and I would read the same book to discuss while running. Good times! 😂 But it is special sharing books with a child to discuss at the same level. I’ve been able to share that with both of my daughters. My son, not so much…

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      1. I feel like it is important to keep on reading. There are so many distractions from that nowadays. Reading is all I did as a kid over summer break. I couldn’t wait to go to the library. I hope that today’s kids still value reading when there are so many other options. It is a great tradition and I’m doing my part to continue it!

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  15. A proud moment indeed! I mean if we can’t bound over Lizzy and Mr Darcy we can ALWAYS bound over our dislike of Mr Collins, right?? 😄😄 I’m happy to hear how you two have bonded over P&P, especially as the few times you’ve mentioned it in passing it sounded like your daughter wasn’t really into it. If she ever gives Jane Austen another chance, I’m wondering if she’d like Emma better? Never know. I love all JA. But I’m on the biased side!! 😊

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  18. Do you know, I have never read it ! Perhaps I should? My reading mojo has up and left in recent years, perhaps this one will get it back. I absolutely love period dramas so why not!

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  19. I loved reading this. I can so relate! My son had World Lit. this semester, and last year, he had Brit. Lit., and he took nearly all my suggestions on which novels to read from the lists. lol And we had wonderful discussions. His Brit. Lit. teacher was very surprised that my son wanted to read Wuthering Heights. lol I told him he’d love it since he loves that kind of writing. Well, he loved it. ^_^ And this year, he read books from all over the globe from different continents and countries. The main ones he really liked were All Things Fall Apart (set in Nigeria, written by a Nigerian, for which I read in my World Lit. class last year!), The Martyr(s) (set in North Korea..and his choice because I’d not read that or heard of it), The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde (my suggestion…read an excerpt in my World Lit. class and loved Stevenson’s psalmic writing style…my son loved it), The Kiterunner (my suggestions…heard it was excellent but hadn’t gotten around to reading it. My son loved it…it was his favorite thus far), Crime and Punishment (more his father’s suggestion and mine to a lesser extent because I have not read it, but it is my husband’s favorite fiction novel…My son thought it was a difficult read, but thought it was good), One Hundred Years of Solitude (my suggestions…read this in my little online book club several years ago. My son was not enjoying it too much, but eventually did), and One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich. He thought that was all right. In any case, when I was taking my Brit. Lit. course and deciphering Beowulf, he was there to help me because he loves that poem. lol And we discussed Othello, which was after that, and then Frankenstein, which was the book I did my analytical paper on. 🙂 I put the book in his room for him to read later. lol 🙂

    Yes, BONDING between parent and child through literature is an awesome experience! Thanks for allowing me to share my experiences, too!

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    1. Reading how you bonded with your son over literature makes me feel great!! Ok…kite runner….seriously amazing book!! My daughter is taking what her school refers to as college English (is curriculum is curated by a local college) and it’s all British lit. I cant wait because I love British lit!!

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      1. Thanks! Oh, cool. I can understand why you can’t wait. I love British lit. too! You’ll have to share the books she’ll be reading with us in a future blog post. 😀 Enjoy!

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  20. Wow that’s beautiful ❤️ Pride and Prejudice is one of my top favorite books of all time. I absolutely love everything about it Jane Austen really created a masterpiece (one of her many!). I love it when people book talk- it makes me so happy and there’s a whole new level of connecting, as you yourself felt with your daughter. Also, a very very interesting book is Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand and another of her books called The Fountainhead. Very intellectual and a whole lot of other emotions! This post made me happy, thank you!!

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  22. What a lovely tale – it quite warms the heart. Mine was a late reader and I had to hold my breath (and my tongue) when she finally kicked off a regular reading habit by reading the trashiest of the trash. We never got to talk about P&P as she jumped right over most fiction and headed straight into non-fiction of the heavy-weight and thought-provoking sort. So, yeah, a different kind of pride – but still very much pride 🙂

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