In February, A Utah elementary school told its students that they were not allowed to say “No” to anyone asking them to the Valentine’s Dance.
The school later overturned this decision due to parental complaints.
Telling girls and boys that they must say “YES” to a someone because the asker might feel bad if declined?
Let me let you in on a secret. You don’t have to like everyone just because everything in our society includes a like button. (FYI- you still must like my posts, because I exist outside of these boundaries)
Think back to my post yesterday. I discussed how some parents try to pave the way for their child so that the child has no set backs or disappointments. This dance thing- this is what happens when you try to clear the path: ridiculous rules meant to save a child from suffering.
Does anyone really think this is the right path?
The problem is, we’re focusing on the wrong issues. Yes, we want our children to feel good about themselves, but there are better ways to do that. Think about the ramifications that a “must say yes” mentality has? Besides the fact that it is not realistic at all.
Instead of making children “like” one another, why don’t we focus on being kind to one another. Kind. That’s a concept that our children should be taught. Be a kind person.
How about respect. Teach your child to be respectful to those around them, whether they are teachers, or students or anyone. Tell them to respect the ideas of others whether or not you agree with them. Tell them to stop the shaming, and the eye rolling and the trolling.
We have a generation of children raised on everyone gets a trophy, and everyone must be invited to everything.
How’s that working out?
Instead of worrying that someone might not feel confident if they are told no, let’s work in building self esteem the proper way. Work hard, do the best you can, finish a task once it’s started.
Let’s work on teaching children to be kind to others. This doesn’t mean they have to like everyone. It just means that they treat them with dignity. Let’s teach our kids to be respectful of others. Again, not like, but accept.
And remember the most important thing: learn to like yourself. Teach your children to like their quirks, their strengths and their weaknesses. Because that ‘s the person to like: yourself.