The onset of the new year always makes me nostalgic.  I think about fond memories of the past year, and the past in general. And then I think about the future. I think about all the good things that are in store for me.  and sometimes the thoughts about the past, the present and the future all sort of blend together.

A few weeks ago, we ordered Chinese take out.  For the most part, NYC restaurants go longer send fortune cookies and Chinese noodles with the food.  We’re more “elevated” here, or cost conscious, or “cheap” to do that.  But one neighborhood place still sends out the cookies along with the wonton soup and fried veggie dumplings.

“Reconcile with an old friend.  All has been forgotten.”

That’s what the fortune said.  I placed it on my magnet board, because oddly, I’ve been thinking about an old friend.  I considered reaching out to this old friend, right around the time I got the fortune.   Weird, right?  Is it a sign?  Or am I just trying to make it a sign?

I’m not one to hold grudges- I think that life is too short.  I don’t like being at odds with people- I think it is a waste of energy that should be used positively instead of negatively.  It takes the same amount of energy to be happy as it does to be mad.  These are not some sort of fortune cookie wisdom- these are my own personal mantras.  These are things I try to live and practice.  And to be fair, I probably did once see them on a fortune cookie.

But back to the actual situation.  I had a falling out with a friend a few years ago.  To be clear- both of us were wrong and both of us were right.  It was a pretty evenly sided falling out.  But I miss talking to this person because they are smart and funny.  And a whole bunch of other things, but we will leave it at,  their absence in my life is felt.

So now, do i reach out to this person?  According to the fortune cookie, they are ready to make amends.  But, are they?  I might need to get an order of wonton soup just to get a fortune.  (Actually, I’ll need to order two things because I need two fortunes cookies- if I only get one I will just give it to my daughter, and I will be fortuneless)

Are some things better left alone?  Are some friendships meant to die out?  These are going to be thoughts for the upcoming year- be prepared for some blogs about them.

Happy New Year!!!

63 thoughts on “Fortune Cookie Wisdom”

  3. Good luck on your decision! (I’m sorta the same way; thinking if it’s a sign or if I am making it into one. Decisions for me either come naturally or not at all. I need to learn to find a middle ground!) And I look forward to hearing more on the questions turned expand blog posts! 🙂 Kelsey.

    Liked by 3 people

    Reply

  4. Interesting. Sometimes I find myself in the same dilemma as toward the end of the old year, I take my new address book and transfer numbers and addresses. Inevitably I have addresses and phone numbers of friends I don’t call. Why? Sometimes there is a reason I stopped calling …maybe because I was the one reaching out by going the extra miles or caring more or so I presumed or I felt uncomfortable with something: like the day a work friend and I went to the beach and she told me when my hands were full that she would sign the credit card slip for me. I think I expressed something like, “h**ll you will.” Our friendship never got past that. And for the record, she had some odd things happen to her which I never got past and they made me uncomfortable. Anyway, I have a drawer full of old address books which I can’t get rid of and sometimes I google the person to see if they are still there. If you moved in life, you lose touch with some people but why is it so hard to get rid of these old things. Yet I respect my old decisions.

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

  6. Yes, I think it’s a sign. I think you should just reach out simply with heartfelt message and leave it at that…and if it’s meant to be a reconciliation, then wild horses couldn’t stop it! And if it’s not, then you have peace in your heart for trying. I hope it goes well. xoxo

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

  8. Sometimes you too take a chance on an old friendship but time has moved on. This old friend who wanted to sign the slip: we had a rivalry going on and she was a little jealous when I had the chance to work overseas as a teacher. When I returned, I become very busy only to discover that the same time we were setting up our business, she had some very serious issues. She and her husband divorced and I reached out to her surprised at her circumstances. There was a lot more going on than the divorce. I dropped her before going overseas because I didn’t want any negative energy. I felt guilty, and so I reached out again when I had the chance. It was her choice not to reconcile with me and I respected that. Although I do not judge her problems, I am only surprised. Sometime life is like that. But I wish you the best.

    Liked by 3 people

    Reply

      1. You are welcome. And to be truthful, my old friend’s problems were a mystery to me. Part of me was curious as to why they happened and what exactly was going on: morbid curiosity? It was like a tale you read in a good fiction story..a wee bit unbelievable. But she was fun to be with!

        Liked by 1 person

  10. I always tell people that either complain about a friend or have had a falling away of a friendship, how important is/was that friendship? Do you enjoy being with them when you can? Are they always glad to hear from you? If so, then the friendship is worth keeping even if you are the one who does the calling/planning/first move. If not, then let it die. Many friendships are just for a season and some are life-long no matter how many months/years go by without seeing one another.
    Personally, I am a terrible friend. I am an extrovert in personality but an extreme social introvert so I never call anyone, never answer when I am called, and may or may not text you back. But people love me when I do show up and I am often the life of the party. My friends all know this about me, and allow me to be my odd self and do not take it personally. They also know that I have a chronic illness that makes making plans almost impossible for me since I can be fine one minute and down and out the next. I even miss doing stuff with my grands so you know it is bad!
    So I say, communicate with your lost friend in the manner that is most comfortable for you both and see what happens. If she doesn’t respond, you are no worse for the wear and if she does, it could be a whole new relationship. Keep us posted.

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

  11. I once read that most people in life regret the things they didn’t do not the things they did, so what have you got to lose? You seem to me to be a well balanced person who could deal with a rejection and that’s the worst outcome. I contacted an old friend I hadn’t seen for twenty years and its been a huge success so go on, be brave!

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

  13. I definitely vote for reaching out. Write a letter saying how much you miss the friendship. Don’t mention anything about being half right or half wrong, just that you are sorry to have let so much time go by without her in your life. Then the ball is in her court, but you’ve done what you can. Good luck (and good fortune).

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

      1. I once read that when God feels a friendship has served its purpose in our life, an argument or some falling out happens to show us it is time to move on from that friendship. Sometimes we stay in a friendship out of habit, but we know it is not making us happy and in a way it is holding us back from moving forward with dreams and purpose.

        Don’t they say that people come in our life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.

        Give this some thought and decide where your friendship with this person would fit in… “reason, season or lifetime.”

        If it is a lifetime friendship, then contact the person. If it is not, make peace with the situation as it is.

        That’s how I handle things. 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      3. Maybe that fortune cookie message was meant to help you bring “true closure” to this situation and start 2018 with no guilt or remorse about it.

        Light a candle, put out to the Universe that you wish the person well, you thank them for the friendship they gave you and move on with a clear conscious!

        You have to finish your book!

        Start 2018 fresh, no guilt!

        Happy New Year!

        Liked by 1 person

  16. I have no answers for you & your situation, but I’ve found that, for me, when one door closes another one opens. In other words, the universe puts people in my life for a reason; when they have served their purpose the universe removes them.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  17. You’re right. Life is too short. It’s so much better when we are forgiving. In the end it doesn’t matter who was right or wrong. There isn’t one perfect person on this earth who doesn’t make mistakes. When we remember that we’ve made mistakes either intentionally or unintentionally and have likely hurt others at one time or other, it makes it easier to let little offenses go. That’s just my little opinion. ( :

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  18. Hmmmm. I have wrestled with a wrought relationship for four decades now. This year I gave reconciliation my best shot, by creating a gift that put all of my hurts behind. (I hope.) If they write back, it’ll become a dissonant part of our past; if not, then I shall move on without them. I’m just sorry we’re related, and we’ll keep seeing one another intermittently for the rest of our days.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  19. A very timely topic for me, as I too have been wrestling with an old relationship that went silent about three years ago. For me it’s come up several times in dreams, which tells me there might be something to the whole rapprochement thing. But honestly? It all makes me kind of jealous of your fortune cookie instead. Good luck with whatever decision you make. – Marty

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  21. Trust your gut!
    In my experience, one’s head is all thoughts and logic, and one’s heart is all feelings. Yet the gut just “knows”. Ignoring feelings and logic, what does your gut say?
    Perhaps that’s just me?

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

      1. I find myself wondering what’s the worst that could happen? Is it that your friend has no interest in being friends again? So whether you use logic, feelings, or your gut, it seems to me you’ve got to decide if that is an acceptable outcome. And if not, perhaps that’s your answer.
        However it turns out, I wish you peacefulness. ❤️

        Liked by 1 person

      1. Good luck with it. I’m on the horns of the same dilemma – perhaps we all have one of these? They should declare a Heal The Rift Day on which everyone thinking of someone reaches out to them!

        Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

Gravatar
WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. ( Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. ( Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. ( Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. ( Log Out /  Change )

Cancel

Connecting to %s