Yesterday I wrote about a person I had seen sitting in front of me at a show. I saw that he was rigid and stone faced throughout the performance and I concluded that he was being cranky because he didn’t like the content/theme of the show. Many people thought that perhaps this man had had a bad day and shouldn’t be judged. Fair and correct point- I made an assumption based on what I viewed, but had no actual knowledge of the situation. I know I have acted in inappropriate ways sometimes- I think every parent has. I’ve been to the*%^$#& happiest place on earth, and have seen many parents lose their cool even though they are all at place where it should be fun, fun, fun. Parents are allowed to have feelings other that absolute joy, and parents are allowed to show these feelings. Your kids need to learn that everything is not always happy and pleasant. And no one should judge what any other parent is going through at any particular time. So I realize I made a snap judgement, and you should never judge another parent.
FYI- I’m thinking of changing my name to But….. because I find that I use that word a lot….
I saw a middle school age girl almost jump out of her seat with excitement when John Green took the stage. I saw her look at her Father. I saw her smile drop.
I’m sorry- but I can’t help but feel for that little girl.
Middle school is hard for many kids. There bodies are changing- that’s so much fun when all of a sudden things start popping out….And the emotions! Oh- the emotions! My kid was in this stage not so long ago, and to some degree she still has mood swings, but not like a few years ago. They are confused and angry and they don’t know their place in the world. Part of them longs to be an adult, but part of them still wants to be a child. Their brain is developing, and they don’t quite know how to handle it. One minute they’re crying, then they’re yelling, then they’re laughing. The emotions of tweens is about as confusing as this paragraph.
So I felt for this girl.
I don’t know- but I think sometimes as parents we have to be better. We’re the adults. Maybe a parent needs to suck it up sometimes, and no matter how cranky they are, or how bad a day, they need to maybe smile- even if it’s just for the 10 seconds that your kid is looking at you for confirmation that everything is ok. Yeah- I think sometimes a parent needs to be selfless. I know it’s hard- remember- I wrote a whole blog entitled parenting sucks……By job description- parenting is not easy.
But this little girl- looking up at her father….and the mother was sitting on the other side of the father- if he was in a bad mood, why didn’t he take the aisle seat and have his wife between him and the kid?
See- because I can’t help but think about this girl…..
Now- lets switch this up a little. What if I said the parent was on their cell phone the whole time? What would we think about a parent that was at a show but not paying attention?
I’d say the level of disengagement was exactly the same. The parent was physically present, but emotionally withdrawn.
Let’s switch it up again. What if the father was pissed at his wife, and that was the reason for the scowl? Should you let marital problems interfere with your kids?
So, I’m torn- because I don’t want to judge anyone or their situation. But, I also want kids to enjoy certain moments in their life, because I know that life sucks a lot of the time.